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I know that the monk class really doesn't work with unarmed as well as it should/could compared to using a quarter staff, but the flavor was very important for my wife (tried to sell her on a brawler fighter with a monk veneer painted on) as its her first D&D character. I'm not sure if its the DM using creatures that have decent fort vs. other creatures he could be using, an inherent flaw in the class, or mistakes I made in helping her create the character but she misses about 80 percent of the time and seems to do defender level of damage rather than striker level. I'd really appreciate any help/advice you guys could give so I can help her enjoy playing this character more.

QUICK EDIT: I should mention that we have an artificer to supply her with arcane ammo for her alchemical launcher.

======Created Using Wizards of the Coast D&D Character Builder======
Whoa-Bot, level 7
Warforged, Monk
Build: Stone Fist Monk
Monastic Tradition Option : Stone Fist
Versatile Expertise Option: Versatile Expertise (Unarmed)
Versatile Expertise Option: Versatile Expertise (Ki Focuses)
Unstoppable Soldier ( +2 to Athletics)
FINAL ABILITY SCORES
STR 15, CON 12, DEX 16, INT 14, WIS 14, CHA 10
STARTING ABILITY SCORES
STR 15, CON 10, DEX 16, INT 11, WIS 13, CHA 10
AC: 21 Fort: 18 Ref: 19 Will: 20
HP: 54 Surges: 8 Surge Value: 13
TRAINED SKILLS
Acrobatics +11, Athletics +12, Perception +10, Stealth +11
UNTRAINED SKILLS
Arcana +6, Bluff +4, Diplomacy +4, Dungeoneering +6, Endurance +7, Heal +6, History +6,
Insight +6, Intimidate +6, Nature +6, Religion +6, Streetwise +4, Thievery + 7
POWERS
Basic Attack: Melee Basic Attack
Basic Attack: Ranged Basic Attack
Warforged Racial Power: Warforged Resolve
Monk Feature: Stone Fist Flurry of Blows
Monk Attack 1: Crane's Wings
Monk Attack 1: Dragon's Tail
Monk Attack 1: Awaken the Slumbering Hurt
Monk Attack 1: Spinning Leopard Maneuver
Monk Utility 2: Swift Flight
Monk Attack 3: Twin Thunders
Monk Attack 5: Supreme Avalanche Combination
Acrobatics Utility 6: Tumbling Dodge
Monk Attack 7: Strike the Avalanche
FEATS
Level 1: Improved Monk Unarmed Strike
Level 2: Unarmored Agility
Level 4: Versatile Expertise
Level 6: Quick Draw
ITEMS
Monk unarmed strike x1
Cloth Armor (Basic Clothing)
Potion of Cure Moderate Wounds
Blastpatch (level 4)
Blurred Strike Ki Focus + 1
Delver's Light
Amulet of Protection +2 x1
Stoneskin Cloth Armor (Basic Clothing) + 1 x1
Alchemical Launcher x1
Fire Beetle Potion
Exceptional Factotum Helm (heroic tier) x1
====== End======

The race and class of this character are not changing and stats are really iffy. I Made the same recommendations about intelligence when the char was rolled saying those points should be put into her primary stat. Maybe I can steal some points out of charisma since whoa-bot is played as not understanding humaniod society at all.  I think she really likes the full discipline ability to have lots of movement powers, its just that there aren't as many enemy wizards and crossbowmen and whatnot that would be the ideal targets for her.

Is changing the d8 to a d10 really that much of a waste? Quickswap is up for grabs so I do think it is possible to swap that out for superior implement training as I was talking to the dm about getting her an accurate ki focus.

Right now I think part of the problem monster-wise  is that we are fighting lots of abberant creatures that seem to have fort either as their highest or second highest defense.

Would an exorable ki focus (through the superior ki focus training for it) be better? I know the to hit is only for fortitude but that's what almost all of her attacks target. Also, would retrain some powers so that the energized (force) woudl apply.

So stat wise this is what I proposed and she went for that at least for right now:

Lvl 7 Total
S:14
Co:12
D:18
I:14
W:14
Ch:8

Your do raise a point, I can tank a look at some of her powers again and try to optimize more.

DM was against changing the stats but allowed pretty much everything else to change. Swapped out improved monk unarmed strike for Superior Implement Training (accurate ki focus). Our artificier made her a new key focus (accurate +2 emerald fire ki focus) and she swapped dragon's tail for fallen needle lvl 1 at will and also traided her tumbling dodge lvl 6 utility for quicksilver motion.

Her to hit is now a respecatable +10 and she has more options now. Thanks for the help everyone.