Community

Hehehe.

Just remember, Art Objects are very good candidates for being turned into Wondrous Items. Being masterwork and all.

Any stupid wizard can fly around on an enchanted carpet. But you'll never forget this team of adventurers:

Barbarian - who sails into battle astride an enchanted bearskin carpet, which also roars frighteningly.

Paladin: Having forsook the ground-bound life, she rides into battle astride a beautiful thick throw rug embroidered with care with her Diety's holy symbol on front and back sides.

Wizard: Sails serenely into battle sitting crosslegged on his luxurious deep pile carpet, which gracers his bedroom when not in use as a steed.

Bard: giggling like a lunatic, he swoops around on a quilt made by his very own personal mother, which has a patchwork design made of musical intriments and musical notes.

Ok,

I read these and laughed. I think this is great. This is the kind of stuff that has players asking, "Why did the guy have ?"

So I thought I would toss out a suggestion or two.

(The following is best if read in that annoying announcer/infomercial voice)

Have tons of coins of different value? Why not use the coins to create your own masterpiece. Yes, that's right. Simply order our "coin by number" painting and you too can have a famous work of art that is constructed using those coins that are laying about your lair. Never again be embarrassed to have company over. It makes a great conversation piece, and is fun at parties! We have multiple selections, and a variety of sizes. Sorry, coins not included.

Have you ever felt that your evil holy symbol wasn't big enough to get the job done? Do you seem to lack conviction when presenting it? Why spend a measly 25gp on a cheesy and small silver Holy symbol, when if you order now, you can have the deluxe ultra-mega obscenely lavish GOLD Holy Symbol. Yes, that's right. Brandish your new GOLD Holy Symbol and watch as peons and townsfolk run for their lives. Now I know your thinking, but Didge, that'll cost too much. No my friend, if you act quickly this item is on sale for the low, low price of 100 gp. So order now, before supplies run out!

Have you had one of those bad days where those pesky heroes stop your plans for world domination or total anhilation? Then you escape only to come back to your lair without inspiration on what to do next. Well now there's a reason to put the Doom back into your Day Plan. Yes, even after a sound beating by heroes isn't enough to knock down your spirits when you've got "Inspirational Bad-Guy Paintings". Yes, no matter how gloomy you are, you can't help but look at these and get re-motivated to take on the world...again! You can order yours with your face/likeness standing over the carnage of countless bodies or your likeness high atop a mountain with lightning flickering from your hands destroying the village below. Either one is guarenteed to put the fight back in you*.

*Warning, any and all likelihood of actual success rests solely in the buyer's cunning, survivability, and mostly luck. This company does not guarentee that your plans for world domination or anhilation will actually succeed.


Can't remember which hero did what to annoy you and when, or what their fatal downfall might be? Well fear no longer. For with the NEW BBEG's Day Planner you too can remember key heroes weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Covered in the skin of a wrymling Black Dragon, this books exterior exudes a sense of style, elegance, and taste. A fine lockable clasp made of silver ensures that no matter where it is left, the secrets inside are safe. The Day Planner has over 100 pages, and is compact enough to fit snugly inside your shirt pocket. Each page has a diabolical quote uttered by some of the most renown villians from the past and present. Never again fear sounding like you don't know what you're doing, simply utter one of these at your enemies and know that it was a classic then and still is one now.


Ok I'm out, that was too much fun. :D

Why go just for her Bust, when you can have a full-sized statue?

Think of the fits your party druid will have over all those pets, especially those made from wild species.

As for the furniture, and the rare elven wine, I'd stand those at more value. Wine collectors pay thousands in the real world. My dad used to work for Baker furniture before they shipped all their business down south. You'd be surprised at what rich people pay for pressboard covered over with fancy veneers. Even before stuff like pressboard, a solid oak table was a valuble family heirloom. Even if your table and chairs are oak with a fancy veneer, they will be very valuble. Inlay and guilding will also drive up its value. The more hours a crafter has to put into an item, the more expensive it will be.

I'll have to keep this in mind when I play Sims next. There's a lot of luxury items in there too.

What about houseplants? Most modern houseplants are derived from tropical species. Watch your party druid go nuts about that precious rare tropical plant taken from its native envronment.

Fountains also show wealth. Try and cart that off.

If you're going to have fancy cookpots, don't forget those rare spices. Even simple black pepper was once a highly valuble trade comodity. Salt was coinage, once upon a time. The salt mephit in a jar could be rather handy.

That can be arranged....

But it's gonna cost you. Pull out that Platinum Sack of Holding and we'll talk. I do accept Artifacts in trade.