|
5 years ago ::
Oct 22, 2008 - 3:58PM
#41
|
|
|
pretty much all of our games are laugh-a-minute but off the top of my head:
Way back in my current group's first game, I was the DM and introduced the now canon "Magic hole in the jail cell". Basically the magic hole was a bowl-sized divot in the floor of a jail cell. It was the magical equivalent of a toilet for prisoners. One would do one's business in the hole, and the hole would disintegrate your unwanted waste. The players experimented with it; prodding it with their fingers, throwing their clothes in it, etc etc, but only urine and feces were disintegrated in the hole.
A few games later, the players (with new characters) find themselves in a prison cell with (you guessed it) a magic hole in the corner. The Wizard of the party boldly proclaims "I CHOOSE to defecate!". He does so. The waste product does not disintegrate. This confuses the party. They poke and prod. Experiment some more. Get their hands dirty. Then spend several hours in a prison cell staring at a lump of poo in a hole. After some time, they are becoming tired and hungry and irritable due to the smell.
"A small hatch, hidden on the wall above the magic hole opens up, and rice begins to pour out"
The wizard bellows his best "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" and slow-motion dives to save the rice. He fails his roll and lands face first in the magic hole.
The rest of the party ate rice off the back of his head and the wizard cried himself to sleep that night.
----
Another game, another place, another wizard (named Gary):
This is a ~level 13 campaign IIRC, and Gary had invested in a flying broomstick. He was very proud of it. Often lording his extra dimension of movement over the rest of us in the party. Often foiling the DM who hadn't accounted for the extra mobility that flight provides.
The party is trekking through a swamp. It is night time and pretty dark, so a party member lights a torch. Shortly after, they discover that the gas bubbling up from the swamp is mildly explosive (to the amusement of some, the loss of HP to others). The torch is snuffed quickly.
The party slog though the muck for several hours in the dark, until they notice firelight in the trees. With the help of some nightvision the party discovers they have just been ambushed by some nasty looking lizardmen wielding bows with flaming arrows.
Gary calmly says "Man, I sure wouldn't want to be on the ground right now..." and slowly rises another 10ft in the air.
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 22, 2008 - 4:46PM
#42
|
Date Joined:
Apr 11, 2007
|
Our party held the high ground on a hill against a team of orcs. The decision was to charge down hill and smash into their line. As the party went down hill the faster characters got a little ahead of the dwarf.
Half the way down the dwarf failed his check and tripped in the tall grass. A bowling ball therefore smashed into the rest of the party from behind and all had to make saving rolls to see who was still on their feet.
Now my DM had created a critical failure table where if you rolled a 1 you rolled again. A 1 on the critical failure table meant you stabbed yourself with your weapon.
2 out of 6 characters were seriously wounded by their own weapons and only 1 out of 6 kept their feet.
The DM decided the orcs had to make a sav or burst out laughing and fortunately most of them failed.
We lost the encounter, and our dignity, but at least out pathetic attempt at charging them won us their pity.
They ransomed us off and when we were found by the local authorities we were all wearing dunce caps.
This looks like the sort of thing that could pop up at our old table! LOL! But I gotta say, when I saw "A 1 on the critical failure table meant you stabbed yourself with your weapon.", I immediately had this image of an archer, arrow nocked backwards, letting go of the wrong part of the bow. :D
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 23, 2008 - 5:35AM
#43
|
Date Joined:
Jun 25, 2008
|
Way back in 1st Ed our wizard chucked a fireball down a dungeon corridor at some advancing monsters. He thought they were far enough away that we wouldn't get caught in the blast. But the DM was a bit of a mathematician, and pointed out that if the fireball didn't have room to fully expand (a 60' radius sphere as I recall) then it would travel further up and down the corridor to compensate.
Result: the party got toasted too.
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 24, 2008 - 4:45AM
#44
|
Date Joined:
Sep 23, 2007
|
Way back in 1st Ed our wizard chucked a fireball down a dungeon corridor at some advancing monsters. He thought they were far enough away that we wouldn't get caught in the blast. But the DM was a bit of a mathematician, and pointed out that if the fireball didn't have room to fully expand (a 60' radius sphere as I recall) then it would travel further up and down the corridor to compensate.
Result: the party got toasted too.
CLASSIC!!!
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 24, 2008 - 4:54AM
#45
|
Date Joined:
Jun 19, 2006
|
most recently i was gm a battle with some pirates on the pcs airship there were 3 pcs involved in the fight and they were losing they cried out to the other 2 to assist which they did they eventually and took some dmg in the process so they all went below deck to rest . so i made some rolls the pcs were wondering about this . i announced the ship is falling to earth out of control . they panicked, why!!! whats happeneing??? . one pc spoke "wait i am the pilot arent i sorry lads"
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 24, 2008 - 6:43AM
#46
|
|
|
Both of these are using 3.5
Example 1: Once I was going through an adventure with Julius, my Fighter/Death's Chosen, alongside my friend's vampire Warlock, who he loyally served. Our DM was the type to throw random s**t our way, and seeing how he hadn't taken his medication that day we knew something insane was going to happen soon. One of the rooms held a closet, which both of us suspected would have some sort of loot, so the following happens:
Me: "I go to the closet and try to open the door."
DM: "The door is locked shut."
Me: "Okay, I decide to bash the door in." (roll, plus bonuses, comes out around 25)
DM: "You bash the door open, and both of you are promptly trampled by a swarm of kobold who were hiding in the closet."
Friend: "How the hell did they all fit in there!?"
Example 2: The same friend who played the vampire in that last game was playing a fighter in a low-level adventure. I wasn't there, but there were two other players (a cleric and a rogue). The rogue went into an adjacent room from the other two and tried to open a chest. After rolling a die behind his screen, the DM suddenly called for the fighter and cleric to make listen checks. The cleric rolled low while the fighter rolled high. The DM leaned over to the fighter and whispered this in his ear:
DM: "You hear from the other room: *pfft* Agh!"
Apparently the rogue failed his Disarm Device roll and triggered the arrow trap, putting him at 3 hp.
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 24, 2008 - 11:52AM
#47
|
Date Joined:
Feb 18, 2008
|
DM: "You kill the last of the assassins, and now look around the bloody mess that used to be your inn room."
Elf: "Time to get out of here. I grab my sword and head out the door."
Rogue: "I grab my shortbow and head out the door, readying myself to shoot."
DM: "As you head into the second story of the inn, you hear footsteps coming up the stairs."
Rogue: "I shoot my arrow into the stairwell."
Elf: "No, wait!"
DM: "Too late. . . roll to hit. Wow, natural 20. You hear a gurgling sound and a thump."
Elf: "I head over to the stairs."
DM: "You see the dead inkeeper in his nightgown with a candle in one hand and an arrow in his chest. He looks surprised, and a bit disgusted."
Elf: ". . ."
Rogue: "Well, crap."
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 26, 2008 - 1:02PM
#48
|
Date Joined:
Oct 26, 2008
|
When my group and I were first trying 4e I chose to doing something different and try the wizard, eladrin female to be exact. Funny thing is another friend chose the same thing, and we even had almost all the same spells. But that aside, another friend was a lecherous warlock and hit on my friend's eladrin wizard so "she" kicked him in the balls...and scored a crit. So I jump in with great timing and use ghost sounds to make a loud wail come from his balls. the whole group was cracking up it got hard to breathe we were laughing so hard.
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 28, 2008 - 10:32AM
#49
|
Date Joined:
Oct 18, 2008
|
"See? See!? I could have been lighting these @$%# on fire the whole time..."
Artificer/starlock, upon encountering a blazing skeleton in an undrground crypt
|
|
|
|
5 years ago ::
Oct 28, 2008 - 12:08PM
#50
|
Date Joined:
Apr 11, 2007
|
An interesting event happened in our 3e game when the wizard made a great attempt at intimidating a group of thugs. We had a rule for "spectacular successes" in skill use in that if you rolled a natural 20, you rolled again to see if you got another natural 20, repeating the process as often as a natural 20 came up. He managed to roll 3 natural 20's in a row for this skill check. What happened was that the fighter kicked down the door and the wizard (an aggressive character) charged in, followed by the rest of the party. The wizard they yelled "Everyone drop your weapons and surrender NOW!!!" The player made the aforementioned rolls and everyone dropped their swords and fell to their knees, their hands high over their heads... including the members of his own party.
|
|
|
