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Switch to Forum Live View Truly Invincible creature
2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 9:46PM #1
Tigerguy786
Date Joined: Jun 4, 2011
Posts: 488
I'm trying to think of a combination of cards that would lead to a truly invincible card that absolutely cannot be removed to the graveyard in anyway shape or form. It's a thought experiment, so it doesn't have to be in any way practical, I just want to know if it exists.

So far I've come up with a Protean Hydra, Darksteel Armor, General's Kabuto and Tajuru Preserver...the one thing I can't figure out how to get around is something like Black Sun's Zenith.

Any ideas on how to get around that?

Also, I'm new, so I welcome any tips (like making card names into links to the cards) 
And there's the Creepy Doll
That always follows you
It's got a ruined eye
That's always open

And there's a Creepy Doll
That always follows you
It's got a pretty mouth
To swallow you whole
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2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 9:54PM #2
Splattercat
Date Joined: Jan 28, 2006
Posts: 6,479
Is there anything at all that can get around Apocalypse ?

EDIT: Oh, [c[ [/c[ (done correctly with square endbrackets) does card linking. I just learned that now.
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2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 10:01PM #3
Oricalcous234
Date Joined: Mar 16, 2011
Posts: 41
Dont forget, the  Diminish , Turn the tide , and  Twisted Image combo can destroy anything that doesnt have protection from blue 
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2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 10:01PM #4
Tigerguy786
Date Joined: Jun 4, 2011
Posts: 488
i have no idea. It seems like in the infinite combinations of thousands of cards, there would be 1 perfect combination that would result in a truly unkillablke creature.
And there's the Creepy Doll
That always follows you
It's got a ruined eye
That's always open

And there's a Creepy Doll
That always follows you
It's got a pretty mouth
To swallow you whole
Quick Reply
Cancel
2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 10:02PM #5
Vektor480
Date Joined: Apr 5, 2008
Posts: 18,652
Final judgment is also an issue.

If you didn't understand how to autocard by the above post, just check my signature.
OMG click HERE! OMG!
How to autocard and use decklist format  ---> Show
For autocarding, write [c][/c] with the name of the card inside it.

[c]Island[/c] = Island

For linking a card to Gatherer without writting the name of said card for readers, use the autocard brackets together with and equal sign and right the name of the real card. Then put the message you want inside the tags, like you would do with autocarding. Like this:

[c=Curse of the Cabal]Captain Never-resolves[/c] = Captain Never-resolves

For using the decklist format, follow this:
[deck]
4* Terramorphic Expanse
4* Evolving Wilds
...
[/deck]

It equals:

4 x Terramorphic Expanse
4 x Evolving Wilds
...



Real signature, Sblocked for space: Show

Jan 14, 2012 -- 5:42PM, Vektor480 wrote:

I like storm crow because I really like crows in real life, as an animal, and the card isn't terribly stupid, but packs a good deal of nostalgia and also a chunck of the game's history. So it's perhaps one of the cards I have most affection to, but not because "lol storm crow is bad hurr hurr durr".


Listen to my SoundCloud while you read my signature.
  The Island, Come And See, The Landlord's Daughter, You'll Not Feel The Drowning - The Decemberists by vimschy



Quizzles Show




Quotes Show

Mar 17, 2011 -- 10:28PM, Qmark wrote:

Mar 17, 2011 -- 10:15PM, ROBRAM89 wrote:

Although I do assume you deliberately refer to them (DCI) as The Grand Imperial Convocation of Evil just for the purposes of making them sound like an ancient and terrible conspiracy.

Now, now.
1994 doesn't quite qualify as "ancient".


Oct 11, 2011 -- 9:43PM, Tevish_Szat wrote:

Oh, it's a brilliant plan.  You see, Bolas was travelling through shadowmoor, causing trouble, when he saw a Wickerbough Elder with its stylin' dead scarecrow hat.  Now, Bolas being Bolas took the awesome hat and he put it on his head, but even with all his titanic powers of magic he couldn't make it fit.  He grabbed some more scarecrows, but then a little kithkin girl asked if he was trying to build a toupee.  "BY ALL THE POWERS IN THE MULTIVERSE!" he roared, "I WILL HAVE A HAT WORTHY OF MY GLORY." and so he went through his Dark Lore of Doom (tm) looking for something he could make into a hat that would look as stylish on him as a scarecrow does on a treefolk.  He thought about the Phyrexians, but they were covered in goopy oil that would make his nonexistant hair greasy.  He Tried out angels for a while but they didn't sit quite right.  Then, he looked under "e" (because in the Elder Draconic alphabet, "e" for Eldrazi is right next to "h" for Hat) in his Dark Lore of Doom and saw depictions of the Eldrazi, and all their forms.
"THIS SHALL BE MY HAT!" he declared, poking a picture of Emrakul, "AND WITH IT I WILL USHER IN A NEW AGE OF DARKNESS -- ER, I MEAN A NEW AGE OF FASHION!"

And so Nicol Bolas masterminded the release of the Eldrazi.


Feb 25, 2012 -- 2:54PM, Mown wrote:

Rhox War Monk just flips pancakes, and if games have told us anything, it's that food = life.


Jul 11, 2011 -- 10:47PM, Qmark wrote:

Jul 11, 2011 -- 10:36PM, SleetFox wrote:

This thread has gotten creepy.  XP

Really?
Really?

The last couple days have been roughly every perverse fetish imaginable, but it only got "creepy" when speculation on Mother of Runes's mob affiliation came up?


Jun 26, 2011 -- 5:52AM, MrQuizzles wrote:

Jun 26, 2011 -- 4:59AM, Mown wrote:

Jun 26, 2011 -- 4:44AM, skeindubh wrote:


4 tropical island
4 savannah
4 bayou
4 taiga
4 savannah


Nice mana base.
Not really.



Yeah, really. If my deck was going to cost $1000+, I'd at least make it good.


May 2, 2011 -- 8:18AM, desolation_masticore wrote:

I like to think up what I consider clever names for my decks, only later to be laughed at by my wife. It kills me a little on the inside, but thats what marriage is about.


Apr 3, 2011 -- 1:39AM, DrWorm wrote:

Apr 3, 2011 -- 12:02AM, crazysamaritan wrote:

Of course, the best use [of tolaria west ] is transmuting for the real Tolaria.



Absolutely.  I used to loose to my buddy's Banding deck for ages, it was then that I found out about Tolaria , and I was finally able win my first game.


Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:17PM, Maraxas-of-Keld wrote:

WOAH

wait wait wait

Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

You know, being shallow and jusdgmental aside, "I later found out that Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people"



Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

"I later found out that Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people"



Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates



Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

Jon infiltrated



OH MY GOD


Nov 22, 2011 -- 3:52PM, Pontiac wrote:

The only way I'd cast this card is into a bonfire.


Oct 10, 2011 -- 8:55PM, Glasir wrote:

The short answer is that there's no rule barring annoying people from posting, but there a rule barring us from harassing them about it.


Jan 21, 2011 -- 7:11AM, Qmark wrote:


Browbeat is a card that is an appropriate deck choice when there's no better idea available.
"No better idea available" was pretty much the running theme of Odyssey era.


Jul 10, 2012 -- 11:28AM, Dragon_Nut wrote:

Or perhaps it was a more straightforward comment indicating a wish for you to be bitten (Perhaps repeatedly) by a small yet highly venomous arachnid.



Aug 3, 2011 -- 6:46PM, ChaosLight wrote:

You're an idiot, and I'm in no mood for silliness.


Oct 10, 2011 -- 7:30PM, Vektor480 wrote:

Oct 10, 2011 -- 5:53PM, Rubik wrote:

You just... Vektor it.


That's the answer to everything.


Jan 17, 2011 -- 6:16PM, Maraxas-of-Keld wrote:

Jan 17, 2011 -- 5:58PM, Ragnarokio wrote:


I think the problem is that you don't exist.


This would sound great out of context!


Dec 19, 2011 -- 9:07PM, Dilleux_Lepaire wrote:

Modern is like playing a new tournament every time : you build a deck, you win with it, don't bother keeping it. Just build another, its key pieces will get banned.


Aug 4, 2011 -- 2:15PM, Mown wrote:

Aug 4, 2011 -- 1:45PM, Suudsu2200 wrote:


I specifically remember posting a thread when I was just a witty bitty noob.


You make it sound like that's still not the case.


Jan 4, 2011 -- 3:04AM, Niklor wrote:

Rap is what happens when the c from crap is taken away.


Doug Beyer:

But sometimes it's also challenging. Because sometimes OH MY GOD, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS THING?


Mar 20, 2012 -- 1:32PM, Terti wrote:

Flashforward five thousand years (Click for atmosphere) :


Aug 15, 2011 -- 8:06PM, Veslfen wrote:

to paraphrase Jeff Goldblum, Vektor finds a way.


Aug 1, 2011 -- 12:35AM, Ragnarokio wrote:

when in rome RAPE AND PILLAGE


Jan 31, 2012 -- 11:23AM, TchainT wrote:

I always find it helpful when im angry to dress up in an owl costume and rub pennies all over my body in front of a full body mirror next to the window.


Dymecoar:

Playing Magic without Blue is like sleeping without any sheets or blankets.  You can do it...but why?


Omega137:

Me: "I love the moment when a control deck stabilizes. It feels so... right."
Omega137: "I like the life drop part until you get there, it's the MtG variant of bungee jumping"


Zigeif777:

Just do it like Yu-Gi-Oh or monkeys: throw all the crap you got at them and hope it works or else the by-standers (or opponents) just get dirty and pissed.


Apr 1, 2011 -- 10:29AM, JustTerrorIt wrote:

Apr 1, 2011 -- 10:09AM, quadibloc wrote:

It's true that Alpha and Beta didn't contain any cards like Tarmogoyf , Darksteel Colossus , or Platinum Angel . It just contained weak, insignificant cards like Black Lotus , Mox Sapphire , and Time Walk .


Normally it's difficult to pick up on your jokes/sarcasm. But this one's pretty much out there. Good progress. You have moved up to Humanoid. You'll be Human in no time.


Sep 26, 2010 -- 5:11PM, Test-Subject_217601 wrote:

Sep 26, 2010 -- 5:06PM, NeoMint wrote:

I didn't know Samurai were known to be able to cut down whole armies...


They can when they're using lightsabers !


Sep 19, 2011 -- 11:59AM, Sebanovich wrote:

Sep 19, 2011 -- 11:54AM, Long_Con wrote:

My wife brought home a baby black squirrel they found on a horse track and cared for it for a few days.  We named it Grixis, but it died. 


Unearth it!


Jan 15, 2011 -- 8:07PM, Maraxas-of-Keld wrote:

I'm a Da Vinci Neurok.





And I'm on Magic Arcana. How about you?
Oh, by the way, I'm also on From the Lab now.
Twice, actually. And now with my own submited decklist!
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2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 10:03PM #6
Dilleux_Lepaire
Date Joined: Dec 6, 2005
Posts: 8,872
Nothing can prevent mass exiling like Apocalypse . However, you could stop your opponent from casting spells! Cards that reduce toughness of all creatures can't be answered.

As for the counters, Melira, Sylvok Outcast or Tatterkite may be of some use to you.
Rules Advisor

Quotes Show

Jan 10, 2011 -- 11:15AM, Uhhsam wrote:

giving a magnet to a dude in a mask with a little dagger so he can single-handedly bring down the meanest fatty ever to annihilate a plane .



Feb 23, 2011 -- 10:29AM, RPJesus wrote:

Feb 23, 2011 -- 6:21AM, Dragon_Whelp wrote:

Feb 23, 2011 -- 4:48AM, Riorvard wrote:

Rancor dies to in-response removal.



Yeah... Until next game, where it'll be right back.

Seriously, there's no way to deal with Rancor in any format. It should be banned, except Gleemax is a lobbyist for the Rancor party, so that'll never happen.


You can't ban rancor, it just returns to your deck.



Apr 16, 2011 -- 12:06PM, Dragon_Whelp wrote:

Apr 16, 2011 -- 12:02PM, KeeperofManyNames wrote:

You might want to actually talk to the Flavor & Storyline Board people... since, you know, our whole reason for playing Magic is the flavor. I'm willing to bet you'll get a lot more interest there than in General.



Indeed, both posters down there would be thrilled.



Apr 26, 2011 -- 5:10PM, Vektor480 wrote:


I think I wasn't direct enough in my last post. I'll try to fix it now.
Ahem...
NO ONE CARES

there you have it.



May 3, 2011 -- 9:29AM, JustTerrorIt wrote:

When talks about banning Jace first started, I was thinking that I would see him banned come June 20th. But as I think more about it, I don't really think that Jace is the problem anymore. Sure his power level leaves very little to the imagination (opening Jace is like opening a refrigerator box with a naked girl on the inside), and sure his price does have a strong impact on what players choose to play (playing Jace is like being intimate with a woman and she doesn't charge you in the morning), but it is not the source of all the problems in Standard.



May 24, 2011 -- 12:02AM, SleetFox wrote:

How do people think saving room to print more abilities on cards is dumbing down the game?

Do you really think, say, Akroma would ever be printed if she said, "Akroma can block by creatures with this ability and cannot be blocked by creatures without this ability.  If a creature without this ability would deal combat damage by Akroma would be destroyed, prevent all combat damage that creature would deal to Akroma this combat.  Attacking does not cause Akroma to tap.  If Akroma is blocked and deals lethal damage, it deals the remainder of its damage to the defending player.  Akroma may attack and use abilities that require tapping in the casting cost the turn it enters the battlefield.  Akroma cannot be damaged, enchanted, equipped, blocked or targeted by black or red sources" rather than her "dumbed down" wording she has?  No freaking way.  Keywording and shorthand allows them to make complicated cards easy to play with, allowing them to be printed in the first place.



May 30, 2011 -- 5:57PM, Vektor480 wrote:

The creation of praetors was worth it just because now amoeboid changeling is a praetor.



Jul 6, 2011 -- 4:06AM, Purple_Shrimp wrote:

1. cast frankie peanuts 2. ask opponent "will you concede the game this turn"? if they say yes, you win; if they say no, play a staying power
3. subsequently ask "will you attack this turn"? and "will you cast a spell this turn"? (using a Teferi, Mage of Zhalfir for the second question if necessary) to ensure they can't disrupt the combo
4. donate them a platinum angel
5. play a mox lotus and braingeyser them for every card in their library. play an opalescence and donate them a glorious anthem and a blacker lotus , then play enchanted evening . play and activate a mindslaver and then donate them a fastbond and the mox lotus (returning one of the donates to your hand with eternal witness or whatever)
6. during their turn, play every permanent in their hand (playing lands with fastbond) then (as yourself) cast mirrorweave on the blacker lotus, so every permanent becomes a copy of it. proceed to tear up every card they control, and hopefully do it before they notice that they aren't bound by staying power's ability anymore and can concede



Sep 8, 2011 -- 10:08AM, SereneChaos wrote:

Sep 8, 2011 -- 10:03AM, JustTerrorIt wrote:

Sep 8, 2011 -- 9:39AM, SereneChaos wrote:


One part of the statement being true=/=the whole statement true.


Whatever.
I'm still here about ten minutes away. Whenever you want to get destroyed in Magic, I'm available.



I would like to get destroyed in Magic, actually. Do you know anybody good enough?



Sep 9, 2011 -- 11:30AM, ElvenSoma wrote:

Please format your statements in a way that doesn't look like a baboon hit its face on your keyboard.



Sep 10, 2011 -- 2:58AM, Purple_Shrimp wrote:

why did Garruk Relentless lose a loyalty counter

Spoiler: Show

to get to the other side



Oct 8, 2011 -- 10:22AM, catowner wrote:

You're such an obvious troll that you have hexproof and : Regenerate.



Nov 7, 2011 -- 2:34AM, RPJesus wrote:

Nov 7, 2011 -- 12:25AM, krichaiushii wrote:

Dark Ritual being overpowered is determined more by what is done with it than the card itself.


True, but the fact that it enables so many ridiculous things is pretty telling. It's like, sure I can use a shotgun as a bludgeoning instrument, but that doesn't make it not a shotgun.



Nov 21, 2011 -- 12:09PM, Yanmato1 wrote:

Shortly before Serra died, she transferred her spark into an angel whose full name was Asha Avacyn Bolas. Her dragon father groomed her for her positions in Alara and Innistrad, and she's also been getting help from her uncle Ugin in the form of Urza, who was resurrected as Marit Lage to be the avatar as which she projects herself into material realms. Grieslbrand is a split personality who sometimes wanders the planes disguised as a human woman named Liliana Vess.



Nov 22, 2011 -- 6:59PM, rulesinquisitor wrote:

Yeah that (Content Removed) really annoys me.

Moderated by MY_self right about naahowwww!



Dec 5, 2011 -- 4:01PM, Gemstone386 wrote:

Dilleux_Lepaire just won the thread.



Jan 21, 2012 -- 12:45PM, KeeperofManyNames wrote:

And, as usual, Dilleux wins the entire thread. Nice work, sir, nice work.



Dec 14, 2011 -- 2:33PM, signofzeta wrote:

They need to make 9 layers of zones where cards go when they "die".  Much like Hell.



Jan 22, 2012 -- 3:32AM, Escef wrote:


Wow, holy doggy poop, kids, obvious statement is obvious.



Feb 5, 2012 -- 11:35AM, krichaiushii wrote:

Feb 5, 2012 -- 8:48AM, garruk_rellentless wrote:

i don't think your geting it WotC is trying to kill the comption to make it so that there shity app is the only one left.

I haven't tried the app.   How is its use of English grammar?

Cheers!



Feb 23, 2012 -- 1:16PM, JustTerrorIt wrote:

Everyone's life would be easier if players would, instead of coming to the 'net for help with a deck, just netdeck and be done with it. And I'm not talking about some Top 8 lists, for the Casualists, too, can benefit from netdecking. I've netdecked plenty of decks from the Casual Play forums from users such as Mown, Raedien, Floopfoot, and a few others. I snatched straight the heck out of my web browser. Yes, people, your original idea fell victim to a savage netdecker. You have been assimiliated.

Suppose I wanted a Zombie deck. Why on earth would I spend time searching Gatherer for a decent list of Zombie cards when Raedien already did it for me? Taking time to be creative or waiting on people on the forums to tell you why your deck sucks or 'go to Casual forums' is a disasterous waste of time (to me).



Feb 24, 2012 -- 2:29AM, RPJesus wrote:

Feb 17, 2012 -- 8:07PM, SereneChaos wrote:

If WotC started putting $100 bills in packs, the players would complain that they folded them wrong.


No, they just spam them with ban requests .

That being said, Magic was ruined back in Alpha when they added all that rules and cards [Debutantes avert your eyes]. My friends and I still like playing it the "pure" way (Basically we go into the woods and hit eachother with wiffle bats while shouting made up obscenities. You know, the way Garfield wanted it to be played). 



Mar 12, 2012 -- 11:50AM, RPJesus wrote:

Don't worry about it. I've come up with a list of changes to fix EDH.

-First off, there's no commander.
-The minimum deck size is 60 cards, and each deck can have up to four of each card, save basic lands and relentless rats. Also decks have no color identity.
-Starting life total is 20.

And voila, now things are balanced.



Mar 16, 2012 -- 11:06PM, catowner wrote:

Here's a clever play you can try yourself:
-Convince friend to run relentless rats.dec in legacy tournament
-Get a deck with lots of mill, yixlid jailer, and humility
-Drop humility and jailer, wait for him to dump his hand, mill him out
-All his rats now have no abilities.  Call a judge because he's playing an illegal deck with more than 4 of a single card.
-Get him/her banned from competitive magic play



Mar 21, 2012 -- 2:30PM, wickeddarkman wrote:

But how to mark them without making the individual sleeve different!

You could buy a skunk and slam it's butt on you deck (pardon the french)

Then after the game just sniff at your opponent's pile of cards and you will know if any of your cards are there!!!



Mar 21, 2012 -- 2:38PM, Terti wrote:

In Soviet Russia, Sorin opens You



Apr 18, 2012 -- 3:33PM, HairlessThoctar wrote:

L, is for the leather gloves you weaaaar.
O, is for the organs that guy could spaaaare.
V, is very very, extraordinay.
E, is for every vagrant i butchered in a wine cellar befooooore.



May 11, 2012 -- 5:18PM, TinGorilla wrote:

The outer layer of the Magic: the Gathering box, the carton, or crust, is fairly thin and light, and contains largely aluminosilcates.

Within that lies the middle layer, consisting of the familiar booster pack. Although solid, the booster packs' high temperatures allow them to acutally move around within the booster box. This flow, sometimes called convection, is cited by frustrated box mappers as one of WOTC's most genious uses of thermodynamics since the Ravnica block.

No one knows what lies at the core of the booster box, but scientists theorize that it must be especially dense in order to make up for the large amount of fluff distributed amongst the booster packs.



Jun 15, 2012 -- 9:39AM, Burning_Forest wrote:

Jun 15, 2012 -- 9:31AM, chinkeeyong wrote:

Torpor Orb is absolutely godawful against Vexing Devil .



whoever is playing vexing devil is probably losing anyways



Jun 15, 2012 -- 4:36PM, RPJesus wrote:

I imagine [Ajani 3's] second ability involves him hurling the creature at your opponent Brion Stoutarm style, then the guy is just like "Okay, that may have worked, but don't- GOD DAMN IT!" as he does it again because cats don't give a **** :33.



Jul 6, 2012 -- 5:47PM, RPJesus wrote:


"Do or do not, there is no try." - Albus Dumbledore, The Lord of the Rings.



Jul 16, 2012 -- 3:14PM, catowner wrote:

Jul 16, 2012 -- 1:57PM, zpikduM wrote:

Its like that one time Elves broke out in a field of Jund. Elves became a resurgent hit, then died off again once Jund adapted to the rest of the field of G/W that it required mass removal that inherently pooped on Elves too.

Submit to the menace. Delver can, and will blot out the sun.


Then we shall play in the shade.



Jul 20, 2012 -- 6:02PM, catowner wrote:

I'm sorry, this forum isn't for getting bad advice on mediocre decks, that's standard deck help.  This forum is for starting ****storms.



Aug 13, 2012 -- 7:17AM, bay_falconer wrote:

Aug 12, 2012 -- 5:26PM, GM_Champion wrote:

Your advice would only lead me to make generic, boring, and unworthy content. It's of no use to me.



I just got this image of you as an architect, having finished a building suspended by only a small pole in its southwest corner, saying it's original.

Then the building collapses.



Aug 22, 2012 -- 7:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

I for one love the flavor of legendary lands.

"I remember my days as a youth at Tolarian Academy ."
"Wow, small multiverse, I actually went there too."
"WAIT, DON'T- Well ****, there's $200,000 in student loans well spent."



Aug 26, 2012 -- 11:18AM, RPJesus wrote:


And flavor goes out the window when you cast a second copy of a planeswalker right after the first one dies, so...

"Hey Nissa, I need a favor."
"You just asked me for a 'favor' like thirty seconds ago, and it turned out to be having Sarkhan Transmogrify my only follower into a dragon like 5 times -which dickery aside also violates some laws of causality - and then you let me get beaten over the head by that hedron crab."
"...I'll give you "
"...Well all right then."



Sep 6, 2012 -- 7:35PM, Jessica_Morgan wrote:

GM, I don't think Dill is better than you. I KNOW it. Even if he wakes up every morning, clubs a baby seal, steals all the TV remotes from within a block's radius of his house and then robs hungry orphans of their food he'd be better than you, for the simple reason that he learns from his mistakes.



Oct 8, 2012 -- 9:15AM, AzureShade wrote:


Oct 8, 2012 -- 9:10AM, EyeHunter wrote:

Tamiyo vs. Gideon

What would they have to fight about?  Like, all I can think of now is Gideon going "Hey, long-ears!  I'm gathering a group of 'Walkers together to fight some tentacle monsters.....you want in?"  and Tamiyo going "Ew!  Hentai no bakka Gideon-desu desu!" and flying away.



Oct 13, 2012 -- 12:42AM, Uhhsam wrote:

I open 4 packs just to be on the safe side.  Not only do I get more cards than everyone else, but I also get to spend the rest of the night off.  Win Win.



Nov 5, 2012 -- 10:48AM, Renasce wrote:


MaRo has a thing for people opening boosters with bad cards. But since he can only get so many bad cards printed in each set, he has found a devious way of getting more bad cards into circulation: He makes entire print sheets with just bad rares, then puts them onto the assembly line. He proceeds to wring his hands and twirl his evil mustache that he grew for twirling purposes as a lightning bolt strikes in the background. Afterwards, he goes to make sure that the good cards are only opened by everyone's friends, and that we all only get to open bad cards. He does this by memorising each booster, than switching them around accordingly. Whenever someone complains about a card, he immediately jumps out from behind a chair to yell "WELL, IT'S NOT FOR YOU!" before merging back into the shadows in order to devise new ways in which he can screw over players, then claim that he has valid reasons for doing so.



Nov 29, 2012 -- 9:00AM, bay_falconer wrote:

Nov 29, 2012 -- 8:56AM, GeekyDad wrote:

You open a booster pack, and staring back at you from the rare slot is a Lotleth Troll?

At least I can stick him in my EDH deck and still have four for my standard constructed.



Because lol troll



Dec 20, 2012 -- 9:49AM, Dragon_Nut wrote:

It helped that I more or less skipped most of GM_Champion's longer diatribes. I only have so many brain cells I'm willing to sacrifice each day.



Jan 13, 2013 -- 8:14AM, Catotheyounger wrote:


Mark Rosewater is sitting in a seemingly innocuous cable TV van, outside of Bankaimastery's house.  Sitting nearby are two hardened criminal hackers, fresh out of prison, and filled with resentment at their lack of physical fitness.  "Have you managed to hack his brainwaves yet?  The set deadline's coming up fast."  "We're almost through.  It should be coming up on the screen any second."  The hacker presses a button, and Kevin's thoughts flash onto the screen.  Mark and the hackers stare in amazement at the sheer beauty, the elegance, and the raw truth of what they see.  It's like the ending to 2001:  A Space Odyssey.  Brilliant light shines across the screen, the truth of existence is made clear to them, and they despair at their own foolishness, their own ignorance, their own inadequacy.  And then they steal his ideas.  As they return back to R&D, Mark sneers at a haggard old man chained to a cast-iron sphere.  The man looks up from his laborious task of breaking rocks in the dungeon of Wizards of the Coast headquarters, and asks a question:  "Kevin, my greatest student.  He - he's all right, isn't he?  You didn't hurt him?"  Mark deals him a weighty blow with his boot.  "Know your place, Richard.  Get back to work."



Feb 5, 2013 -- 9:30AM, Jman22 wrote:



Now show me on the Garruk doll where Zac Hill ruined your enjoyment of Magic...



Mar 5, 2013 -- 9:36AM, Astarael7 wrote:

I'm only opposed to it because it bears so little relation to how people actually play the game. The example of Miracles is actually a much better one then the Clone example I was trying to use.

From the game's perspective, the card can move instantly from face down in the library to revealed in the hand and that's fine for the rules. But in real life, we can't actually do that, so the card spends a good bit of time in locations that are neither where that player's library is nor where that player's hand is. And that's fine for real life. What I don't want is the disconnect to be explicitly codified. Along the lines of

183664.697 A game of Magic as laid out by these rules exists only as a pure Platonic ideal, utterly unrealizable by fallible mortals limited by the confines of physicality and the ravages of evil and sin.

183664.698 The cake is a lie, too.

I know it's true, but I don't want the rules to actually straight-up tell me that.



Apr 26, 2013 -- 7:53PM, Decktesting54 wrote:

Apr 26, 2013 -- 3:50PM, Ebontail wrote:

Pfft this cant be serious can it? If it is please delete your account OP. Its not even close to ban worthy, considering what JTMS and stoneforge had to accomplish to get banned i see the WotC selling magic to aquire Pokemon before that ever happens.



I'm trying to imagine sorin markov as a gym leader in one of those pokemon games which you have to beat him to get his badge... somehow I imagine that he would stab you in the chest with his sword before giving you the badge, even if you beat his pokemon....



May 9, 2013 -- 1:23PM, Smoke_Stack wrote:

Personally, I'd be fine with tea time but then I'm not gonna waste the mana summoning Emrakul, the Aeons Torn . He always takes all the sugar, drinks the whole pot of Earl Grey and doesn't even say thank you. SO. RUDE.





Break the Card Show


What is Break the Card? Show

Break the Card is a regular thread in the Cards and Combo Forum. Quite simply, the participants are given a Johnnystatic card (e.g. Xenograft ) and are asked to build a deck around it. The winner and honorable mentions are sigged below. Get brewing!


Week 1 : Xenograft Show

This week's Break the Card was based around Xenograft .
Thread : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/27681049/Break_the_card_:_Xenograft?pg=1

Winner : Axterix with his Vampdrazi deck.
Finalist : Vektor480 with his Ally/Golem/Plant deck.
Honorable mentions : Zammm for the Turntimber Ranger combo and TinGorilla for suggesting Sarkhan the Mad .


Week 2 : Mindlock Orb Show


Here's the link to the Mindlock Orb contest : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/27697565/Break_the_Card_:_Mindlock_Orb?sdb=1&pg=last#497536269

Winner : Axterix with his Maralen of the Mornsong deck.
Honorable mentions : Void_Elemental.



Week 3 : Bludgeon Brawl Show


Here's the link to Break the Card : Bludgeon Brawl : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/27715169/Break_the_Card_:_Bludgeon_Brawl?sdb=1&pg=last#498208797

Winner : Vektor and his Grab the World deck.
Finalist : Crandor with his Awesome Aliteration deck.
Honorable mentions : RP Jesus with his Wat deck and Zix200 with his Signet Renewal deck.



Week 4 : Followed Footsteps Show


This week was Followed Footsteps : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/27748677/Break_the_Card_:_Followed_Footsteps?pg=1

Winner : Tevish_Szat with his Exponential Growth deck.
Honorable mentions : Zix with his Carbon Copies deck and Escef with his Fungus of Speed and Time deck.



Week 5 : Delaying Shield Show


This week's card was Delaying Shield : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/27790101/Break_the_Card_:_Delaying_Shield

Winner : Tevish_Szat.
Finalist : Vampire_Bat.
Honorable Mention : Zix200.



Week 6 : Painter's Servant Show


This week's card was Painter's Servant : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/27940861/Break_the_Card_:_Painters_Servant?pg=1

Winner : Tevish_Szat with his Paint it Black deck.
Finalist : Wprundv with his Tiger, Tiger Painted Bright deck.



Week 7 : Venser, the Sojourner Show


This week's card was Venser, the Sojourner : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/27977489/Break_the_Card_:_Venser,_the_Sojourner

Winner : Izzett with her "Venser, Trickster Trader" deck.
Finalist : Wprundv with his "Tactical Sojourner Action" deck.



Week 8 : Personal Sanctuary Show


This week's card was Personal Sanctuary : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/28005461/Break_the_card_:_Personal_Sanctuary

Winner : MrQuizzles.
Honorable mention : Vampire_Bat and UbberSheep



Week 9 : Sundial of the Infinite Show


This week's card was Sundial of the Infinite : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/28038277/Break_the_card_:_Sundial_of_the_Infinite

Finalist : Izzett with her "Afterlife Trespassers" deck.
Winner : Xeromus with his "Fortune 500" deck.



Week 10 : Jace's Archivist Show


This week's card was Jace's Archivist : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/28063377/Break_the_Card_:_Jaces_Archivist.

Finalists : Jentaru with his "Consecration of the Draw" deck and HereticSmitty with his "ADHD: The deck" deck.
Winner : JaxsonBateman with his "The Archives Are Endless!" deck.



Week 11 : Search the City Show


This week's card was Search the City :
http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29518555/Break_the_Card_:_Search_the_City

Finalist : Mown with "A Thousand Footsteps".
Winner : Desolation_masticore with "Burn the City".


Week 12 : Fiend Hunter Show


This week's card was Fiend Hunter :
http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29530975/Break_the_Card_:_Fiend_Hunter

Winner : Yuyu63 with "Carnival Hunting".
Honorable mention : Dknowle's "Champion the Fiend".



Week 13 : Clock of Omens Show


This week's card was Clock of Omens :
http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29541549/Break_the_Card_:_Clock_of_Omens?pg=1

Winner : Dknowle's "The Myrs Go Marching".



Week 14 : Light of Sanction Show


This week's card was Light of Sanction :
http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29607219/Break_the_Card_:_Light_of_Sanction?pg=1

Winner : Zauzich's "Divine Plague".



Week 15 : Assemble the Legion Show


This week's card was Assemble the Legion :
http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29662307/Break_the_Card_:_Assemble_the_Legion

Winner : JBTM's "Some Assembly Required".



Week 16 : High Tide Show

This week's cards were High Tide and/or Bubbling Muck :
http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29760427/Break_the_Card_:_High_Tide

Winner : Mown's "Puppet Strings".



Week 17 : Illusionist's Bracers Show


This week's card was Illusionist's Bracers : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29776943/Break_the_Card_:_Illusionistss_Bracers

Winner : Enigma256's "Tezzeret's Bracers"


Week 18 : Savor the Moment Show


This week's card was Savor the Moment :
http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29787235/Break_the_Card_:_Savor_the_Moment

Winner : POSValkir's "A Savory Filibuster!"



Week 19 : Grinning Ignus Show


This week's card was Grinning Ignus : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29795547/Break_the_Card_:_Grinning_Ignus

Winner : dknowle's "Luren' and Laughin'".



Week 20 : Transcendence Show


This week's card was Transcendence : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29806481/Break_the_Card_:_Transcendence

Winners : Mown's "Transcending Timing Restrictions" and Dknowle's "Blinded by Greed", tied for the win.



Week 21 : Mortus Strider Show


This week's card was Mortus Strider : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29818471/Break_the_Card_:_Mortus_Strider

Winner : SimonGlume's "Mortus Head".



Week 22 : High Priest of Penance Show


This week's card was High Priest of Penance : http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75842/29917231/Break_the_Card_High_Priest_of_Penance

Winners : JBTM's "Two Clerics and a Goblin walk into a (Bom)bar(dment)..." and POSValkir1's "Choke Their Rivers with Our Dead!".



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2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 10:05PM #7
Vektor480
Date Joined: Apr 5, 2008
Posts: 18,652

Jun 4, 2011 -- 10:01PM, Oricalcous234 wrote:

Dont forget, the  Diminish , Turn the tide , and  Twisted Image combo can destroy anything that doesnt have protection from blue 


This is a very, very unneficient way of destroying a creature. And the creature just needs shroud or any other variant for being unnafected by it. Instead of going trough all these loops, if you want to kill something in mono, just use ovinize and a P switching effect. Or Serendib Sorcerer + Merfolk Thaumaturgist for an in-block and repeatable way of getting mono removal.

OMG click HERE! OMG!
How to autocard and use decklist format  ---> Show
For autocarding, write [c][/c] with the name of the card inside it.

[c]Island[/c] = Island

For linking a card to Gatherer without writting the name of said card for readers, use the autocard brackets together with and equal sign and right the name of the real card. Then put the message you want inside the tags, like you would do with autocarding. Like this:

[c=Curse of the Cabal]Captain Never-resolves[/c] = Captain Never-resolves

For using the decklist format, follow this:
[deck]
4* Terramorphic Expanse
4* Evolving Wilds
...
[/deck]

It equals:

4 x Terramorphic Expanse
4 x Evolving Wilds
...



Real signature, Sblocked for space: Show

Jan 14, 2012 -- 5:42PM, Vektor480 wrote:

I like storm crow because I really like crows in real life, as an animal, and the card isn't terribly stupid, but packs a good deal of nostalgia and also a chunck of the game's history. So it's perhaps one of the cards I have most affection to, but not because "lol storm crow is bad hurr hurr durr".


Listen to my SoundCloud while you read my signature.
  The Island, Come And See, The Landlord's Daughter, You'll Not Feel The Drowning - The Decemberists by vimschy



Quizzles Show




Quotes Show

Mar 17, 2011 -- 10:28PM, Qmark wrote:

Mar 17, 2011 -- 10:15PM, ROBRAM89 wrote:

Although I do assume you deliberately refer to them (DCI) as The Grand Imperial Convocation of Evil just for the purposes of making them sound like an ancient and terrible conspiracy.

Now, now.
1994 doesn't quite qualify as "ancient".


Oct 11, 2011 -- 9:43PM, Tevish_Szat wrote:

Oh, it's a brilliant plan.  You see, Bolas was travelling through shadowmoor, causing trouble, when he saw a Wickerbough Elder with its stylin' dead scarecrow hat.  Now, Bolas being Bolas took the awesome hat and he put it on his head, but even with all his titanic powers of magic he couldn't make it fit.  He grabbed some more scarecrows, but then a little kithkin girl asked if he was trying to build a toupee.  "BY ALL THE POWERS IN THE MULTIVERSE!" he roared, "I WILL HAVE A HAT WORTHY OF MY GLORY." and so he went through his Dark Lore of Doom (tm) looking for something he could make into a hat that would look as stylish on him as a scarecrow does on a treefolk.  He thought about the Phyrexians, but they were covered in goopy oil that would make his nonexistant hair greasy.  He Tried out angels for a while but they didn't sit quite right.  Then, he looked under "e" (because in the Elder Draconic alphabet, "e" for Eldrazi is right next to "h" for Hat) in his Dark Lore of Doom and saw depictions of the Eldrazi, and all their forms.
"THIS SHALL BE MY HAT!" he declared, poking a picture of Emrakul, "AND WITH IT I WILL USHER IN A NEW AGE OF DARKNESS -- ER, I MEAN A NEW AGE OF FASHION!"

And so Nicol Bolas masterminded the release of the Eldrazi.


Feb 25, 2012 -- 2:54PM, Mown wrote:

Rhox War Monk just flips pancakes, and if games have told us anything, it's that food = life.


Jul 11, 2011 -- 10:47PM, Qmark wrote:

Jul 11, 2011 -- 10:36PM, SleetFox wrote:

This thread has gotten creepy.  XP

Really?
Really?

The last couple days have been roughly every perverse fetish imaginable, but it only got "creepy" when speculation on Mother of Runes's mob affiliation came up?


Jun 26, 2011 -- 5:52AM, MrQuizzles wrote:

Jun 26, 2011 -- 4:59AM, Mown wrote:

Jun 26, 2011 -- 4:44AM, skeindubh wrote:


4 tropical island
4 savannah
4 bayou
4 taiga
4 savannah


Nice mana base.
Not really.



Yeah, really. If my deck was going to cost $1000+, I'd at least make it good.


May 2, 2011 -- 8:18AM, desolation_masticore wrote:

I like to think up what I consider clever names for my decks, only later to be laughed at by my wife. It kills me a little on the inside, but thats what marriage is about.


Apr 3, 2011 -- 1:39AM, DrWorm wrote:

Apr 3, 2011 -- 12:02AM, crazysamaritan wrote:

Of course, the best use [of tolaria west ] is transmuting for the real Tolaria.



Absolutely.  I used to loose to my buddy's Banding deck for ages, it was then that I found out about Tolaria , and I was finally able win my first game.


Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:17PM, Maraxas-of-Keld wrote:

WOAH

wait wait wait

Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

You know, being shallow and jusdgmental aside, "I later found out that Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people"



Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

"I later found out that Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people"



Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates



Aug 30, 2011 -- 5:07PM, RPJesus wrote:

Jon infiltrated



OH MY GOD


Nov 22, 2011 -- 3:52PM, Pontiac wrote:

The only way I'd cast this card is into a bonfire.


Oct 10, 2011 -- 8:55PM, Glasir wrote:

The short answer is that there's no rule barring annoying people from posting, but there a rule barring us from harassing them about it.


Jan 21, 2011 -- 7:11AM, Qmark wrote:


Browbeat is a card that is an appropriate deck choice when there's no better idea available.
"No better idea available" was pretty much the running theme of Odyssey era.


Jul 10, 2012 -- 11:28AM, Dragon_Nut wrote:

Or perhaps it was a more straightforward comment indicating a wish for you to be bitten (Perhaps repeatedly) by a small yet highly venomous arachnid.



Aug 3, 2011 -- 6:46PM, ChaosLight wrote:

You're an idiot, and I'm in no mood for silliness.


Oct 10, 2011 -- 7:30PM, Vektor480 wrote:

Oct 10, 2011 -- 5:53PM, Rubik wrote:

You just... Vektor it.


That's the answer to everything.


Jan 17, 2011 -- 6:16PM, Maraxas-of-Keld wrote:

Jan 17, 2011 -- 5:58PM, Ragnarokio wrote:


I think the problem is that you don't exist.


This would sound great out of context!


Dec 19, 2011 -- 9:07PM, Dilleux_Lepaire wrote:

Modern is like playing a new tournament every time : you build a deck, you win with it, don't bother keeping it. Just build another, its key pieces will get banned.


Aug 4, 2011 -- 2:15PM, Mown wrote:

Aug 4, 2011 -- 1:45PM, Suudsu2200 wrote:


I specifically remember posting a thread when I was just a witty bitty noob.


You make it sound like that's still not the case.


Jan 4, 2011 -- 3:04AM, Niklor wrote:

Rap is what happens when the c from crap is taken away.


Doug Beyer:

But sometimes it's also challenging. Because sometimes OH MY GOD, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS THING?


Mar 20, 2012 -- 1:32PM, Terti wrote:

Flashforward five thousand years (Click for atmosphere) :


Aug 15, 2011 -- 8:06PM, Veslfen wrote:

to paraphrase Jeff Goldblum, Vektor finds a way.


Aug 1, 2011 -- 12:35AM, Ragnarokio wrote:

when in rome RAPE AND PILLAGE


Jan 31, 2012 -- 11:23AM, TchainT wrote:

I always find it helpful when im angry to dress up in an owl costume and rub pennies all over my body in front of a full body mirror next to the window.


Dymecoar:

Playing Magic without Blue is like sleeping without any sheets or blankets.  You can do it...but why?


Omega137:

Me: "I love the moment when a control deck stabilizes. It feels so... right."
Omega137: "I like the life drop part until you get there, it's the MtG variant of bungee jumping"


Zigeif777:

Just do it like Yu-Gi-Oh or monkeys: throw all the crap you got at them and hope it works or else the by-standers (or opponents) just get dirty and pissed.


Apr 1, 2011 -- 10:29AM, JustTerrorIt wrote:

Apr 1, 2011 -- 10:09AM, quadibloc wrote:

It's true that Alpha and Beta didn't contain any cards like Tarmogoyf , Darksteel Colossus , or Platinum Angel . It just contained weak, insignificant cards like Black Lotus , Mox Sapphire , and Time Walk .


Normally it's difficult to pick up on your jokes/sarcasm. But this one's pretty much out there. Good progress. You have moved up to Humanoid. You'll be Human in no time.


Sep 26, 2010 -- 5:11PM, Test-Subject_217601 wrote:

Sep 26, 2010 -- 5:06PM, NeoMint wrote:

I didn't know Samurai were known to be able to cut down whole armies...


They can when they're using lightsabers !


Sep 19, 2011 -- 11:59AM, Sebanovich wrote:

Sep 19, 2011 -- 11:54AM, Long_Con wrote:

My wife brought home a baby black squirrel they found on a horse track and cared for it for a few days.  We named it Grixis, but it died. 


Unearth it!


Jan 15, 2011 -- 8:07PM, Maraxas-of-Keld wrote:

I'm a Da Vinci Neurok.





And I'm on Magic Arcana. How about you?
Oh, by the way, I'm also on From the Lab now.
Twice, actually. And now with my own submited decklist!
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2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 10:11PM #8
Oricalcous234
Date Joined: Mar 16, 2011
Posts: 41

You have a good point Vektor480 but none of those cards are legal in standard. My combo is still legal in all formats.

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2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 10:12PM #9
Oricalcous234
Date Joined: Mar 16, 2011
Posts: 41

You have a good point Vektor480 but none of those cards are legal in standard. My combo is still legal in all formats.

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2 years ago  ::  Jun 04, 2011 - 10:17PM #10
Oricalcous234
Date Joined: Mar 16, 2011
Posts: 41
Now back to an invinsable creature, Emrakul, the Aeons Torn with Darksteel Plate and    Whispersilk Cloak is pretty indestructable
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