1001 Wish Screw-ups

2571 posts / 0 new
Last post
Hey, I just had a fun idea for a game/1001 thread. At the beginning of your post, give an undesireable interpretation of the wish posted by the person right above you. Then share any wish stories you have, and finally give the wish for the next poster to screw up. Make sure to number your interpretations and stories.

Wish: I wish for a horde of powerful monsters that would always, and immediately, follow my commands.
The "Corrupted Wish Game" is already running in the Posting Games section of the Rec Room. Has been for a good long time.
Wish: I wish for a horde of powerful monsters that would always, and immedietly, follow my commands.

You become a wraith.

Wish: I wish that someone would post a hyperlink to the aforementioned "Corrupted Wish Game" in the Posting Games section of the Rec Room.
Wish: I wish that someone would post a hyperlink to the aforementioned "Corrupted Wish Game" in the Posting Games section of the Rec Room.

Granted but the board is deleted
I wish i had a weapon that would kill any thing it sees and i could control it.
I am Blue/White
I am Blue/White
Take The Magic Dual Colour Test - Beta today!
Created with Rum and Monkey's Personality Test Generator.
I'm both orderly and rational. I value control, information, and order. I love structure and hierarchy, and will actively use whatever power or knowledge I have to maintain it. At best, I am lawful and insightful; at worst, I am bureaucratic and tyrannical.

Wizard.jpg
D&D Home Page - What Class Are You? -

I wish this Adventure would end without harm to myself.
I wish this Adventure would end without harm to myself.

Your opinions and thoughts are unoppressed, so your 'self' is preserved, however, your physical body is beaten, tortured, and abused to it's very limits every day.

I wish this wish will be corrupted.
I wish this wish will be corrupted.

Wish remains intact, and existent, but is not granted. And you now have herpes.
I wish I had the powers of the DM. :D

A running gag in my group.
I forgot to put a wish in my previous post to have it corrupted.

I wish everyone in the world liked me, and thought favorably of me.
I forgot to put a wish in my previous post to have it corrupted.

I wish everyone in the world liked me, and thought favorably of me.

Granted, but only because you perform sexual favors for everyone daily. And I mean everone.

I wish I was Samurai Jack.
Wish granted: You become a 2 dimensional cartoon character whose actions are completely decided by 3 dimensional artists, and you now only exist for half an hour twice a week, after which you cease to exist until the next week.

I wish I knew the answer to every question.
Wish granted: You become a 2 dimensional cartoon character whose actions are completely decided by 3 dimensional artists, and you now only exist for half an hour twice a week, after which you cease to exist until the next week.

I wish I knew the answer to every question.

Granted. But the weight of the knowledge bears down on you, forcing you to kill yourself.


I wish I had 20 bucks.
I wish I had 20 bucks.

You are crushed by a stampede of male deer.

I wish for three more wishes
I wish for three more wishes

Wish granted! You may now post three more times on this board, and on this board only.

I wish I could shoot lasers from my figertips, that did no damage to myself, but did damage to my targets.
I wish I could shoot lasers from my figertips, that did no damage to myself, but did damage to my targets.

Granted but your DM kills you because you're overpowered

I wish I had a undead bane and disrupting weapon and my DM did nothing about it, me, or anything or anyone else
I wish I had a undead bane and disrupting weapon and my DM did nothing about it, me, or anything or anyone else

Granted: but you never get to use it because the DM does nothing concerning it, you or anything or anyone else in the campaign.

I wish the next poster first watches this article about a kid bankrupting the Make A Wish Foundation by wishing for more wishes.
Wish granted! You may now post three more times on this board, and on this board only.

I wish I could shoot lasers from my figertips, that did no damage to myself, but did damage to my targets.

Granted! You can only target the ones you love, though.

I wish my shoes weren't so uncomfortable...

EDIT: Oops! I've been uber-ninja'd.
I wish my shoes weren't so uncomfortable...

GRANTED!!!!!!! but....they only last for 7 and a half steps at which point they burst into unholy flame that consumes you completely.
W.T.F was that vid real?
Granted! You can only target the ones you love, though.

I wish my shoes weren't so uncomfortable...

EDIT: Oops! I've been uber-ninja'd.

Granted! You now have your feet in a foot massager. Unfortunately, this foot massager has a three foot power cord.

I wish you wouldn't grant this wish.
I've finally figured out how to put in a sig. Yes, I'm including this here for no other reason than to express how happy I am that I could finally do this. For goodness' sake, change these forums back (or just change, I don't care).
I wish the next poster first watches this article about a kid bankrupting the Make A Wish Foundation by wishing for more wishes.

Granted, but that video clogs the tubes that are the internet, causing the Web to crash, and sending humanity into a spiral of DOOM from which it never recovers.

I wish the battery in my cell phone lasted longer.
granted but it's radio active and you die,\

I wish I new if that vid was real (seriously)
I wish my shoes weren't so uncomfortable...

You're shoes suddenly overcome the psychological trauma of being trodden upon by smelly feat every day.

I wish for every monarch I meet to swear fealty to me unprompted.

Edit: Holy hell was I ever ninja-ed! Anyways, no the vid is not real, it was made by a group/company that makes satirical news shows. Look it up on google like I did.
You're shoes suddenly overcome the psychological trauma of being trodden upon by smelly feat every day.

I wish for every monarch I meet to swear fealty to me unprompted.

Granted. You become a friend to butterflies everywhere.
W.T.F was that vid real?

No (it does say it's from the Onion News Network) but that was exactly the unintended interpretation I was hoping for.

I wish I new if that vid was real (seriously)

Granted. But now you look silly ;)
granted but it's radio active and you die,\

I wish I new if that vid was real (seriously)

Granted : You find out the video is real and the introspection causes severe doubt in your fellow man. You can't bear it any more and apply to the make a wish foundation to unmake your first wish. But they can't fulfil it because they are now bankrupt.

(No I haven't watched it yet, or know if it's read )

I wish I knew why kids went crazy for cinnamon toast crunch.
granted, you try it and find out there's crack in it

I wish I had an unlimited use Prestidigitation ring
I wish I had an unlimeted use Prestidigitation ring

The efreeti casts prestidigitation and crafts you a ring. Your mind is filled with many possible uses for the ring: wear it, throw it at your enemies, sell it...

I wish to know the plans of every one of my enemies.
I wish I had an unpoisoned, undisiesed pie, that is not a cow pie, but is a apple pie, and is 2 feet in diameter and 2 inches thick
I wish I had an unpoisoned, undisiesed pie, that is not a cow pie, but is a apple pie, and is 2 feet in diameter and 2 inches thick

The efreeti takes advantage of your run-on sentence by breaking it up into multiple ones, hearing the following: "I wish I had an unpoisoned, undiseased pie that is not cow pie. Butt is a apple pie, and is two feet in diameter, and is two inches thich."

You get your pie, but your rear end will never be the same...

I wish to have a happy, comfortable, rewarding, and long life.
I wish I had an unpoisoned, undisiesed pie, that is not a cow pie, but is a apple pie, and is 2 feet in diameter and 2 inches thick

You get an unpoisoned, undisiesed apple pie of the desired dimensions. It gives you salmonella, rickets, and the flu, as it is disEASed.
(Spelling counts! True story -- one time, my PCs were in the old Ravenloft module for 1E, and two of them got badly level-drained by wights. Well, one of the PCs had four wishes and asked if he could use them to restore the two PCs levels. I said "yeah, but it'll be a wish per PC." So he writes "I wish that (so and so) would get the levels lost by wrights" for the first two wishes, to which I said "No one was attacked by wrights. Wishes expended." He got the creature's name right on the second go-round.)

I wish for a Tiger tank.
I wish for a Tiger tank.

You get said tiger tank, it falls from a height of 1000 with unerring accuracy and kills you instantly because it weighs like 7 tons.
weighs like 7 tons.

Great wish screw-up, but it's actually more like 57 tons. Wouldn't want the DM to go easy on me... :D
Great wish screw-up, but it's actually more like 57 tons :D

oops, lol, i forgot my wish too.

I wish that 10 gorgeous women would fall madly in love with me, must come completely sane and with no strings attached i.e. psychotic ex boyfriends, also must have some sort of geas so they dont kill me in my sleep.
oops, lol, i forgot my wish too.

I wish that 10 gorgeous women would fall madly in love with me, must come completely sane and with no strings attached i.e. psychotic ex boyfriends, also must have some sort of geas so they dont kill me in my sleep.

They all have another geas (remember, they are still sane, just magically compelled) and have daggers to kill you in your wake. :P

I wish the world was mine.
I wish the world was mine.

The world becomes yours, however your brain explodes from the strain of managing an entire world, next time start with a country.
for the absence of one...

I wish to to gain all of the benefits, but none of the drawbacks, of 8 hours of sleep every time I blink.
for the absence of one...

I wish to to gain all of the benefits, but none of the drawbacks, of 8 hours of sleep every time I blink.

Granted, but the wish removes your eyelids.
People have got to start posting their own wish after they screw someone else's up.

I wish to return safely from every adventure we go on.
You return safely from 30 or 40 adventures, but one night, you return from an adventure, trip on a stone, and break your neck.


I wish to turn into a balor.
Sign In to post comments