Sexual Orientation Speculatory Headcanon Bonanza

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71235715 wrote:
Q: 

Do you believe Magic will ever explore LGBT plots or characters? We've had a straight coupling in Liliana and Jace. Beyond that, how often do you think planeswalkers become romantic interests? How does one navigate the tumultuous dating scene that is the blind eternities (love *is* blind, after all)?


A: 

Oh I hope so. Historically, romance hasn’t taken center stage all that often in Magic stories — tales of the Multiverse tend to focus more on action (with mages and monsters blasting each other with magic) and mystery (with planeswalkers uncovering conspiracies and secrets that hide mystical knowledge). So it’s not even clear how most of our characters might self-identify, you know? For all we know, the known roster of planeswalkers already spans the entire range of romantic preferences.


Magic is a high-action, dynamic fantasy universe built around game of wizards strategically killing one another, so it’s not surprising there haven’t been a lot of storylines that focus on romantic relationships (of any kind). When I first joined the Creative Team, I thought that was the best way to go — keep it about the action. But over the years I’ve softened my view about this. Magic stories still probably shouldn’t be primarily about who’s dating whom, but of course romance is a rich source for stories, and is firmly embedded in fantasy’s roots — and it’s just fun to read about. I believe romance among Magic characters of all stripes could absolutely be done well, with maturity, sensitivity, and humanity. (Btw, the “love is blind/eternities” bit — nice one. I’m totally using that in the trailer if I ever write a period costume drama set on Innistrad or something.)



(Emphasis mine)


It's common for an audience to put a heteronormative perspective on the characters in a work of fiction; that every given character is heterosexual and cisgendered until explicitly declared otherwise. This is kind of a crummy way of thinking about things, and it's completely pointless until such time as a character smooches another character on the mouth. So I was pleased to read that, evidently, Magic Creative views the orientations of its characters as quantum. Which makes sense; until a romnce arc comes up for a given character or their orientation otherwise affects the character or the plot in some way that's worthwhile to the narrative in and of itself, it really doesn't matter.


But we're ALL ABOUT the details that don't matter around here!


So what do you think the planeswalkers' orientations are? And why? Do you see evidence of romantic tension between any of the characters that informs your conclusions? Do you think a certain orientation might explain some element of a character's background? Would you just think it was neat if that character went that way? (Is it because you would like to have a chance?)


Oh, and put your headcanons in a spoiler block if you could, thanks.

Ajani Goldmane: Heterosexual
The sole purpose of this decision is because it's the orientation that best protects my Ajani/Elspeth OTP.


Chandra Nalaar: Bisexual*
Also to support my horrible pointless background shipping. Her romantic tension issues with Gideon are undeniable, but we also remember that incident with Liliana, don't we?
Don't we?


Domri Rade: Who cares?


Elspeth Tirel: Heterosexual
See Ajani Goldmane.


Garruk Wildspeaker: Heterosexual*
I think we've gone over this before, actually. Garruk leads a very atavistic lifestyle, very in touch with himself. But he has better stuff to do than pork all day. I doubt he ever actually gets any, nor does he mind.


Gideon Jura: Homosexual
Mostly just because it's interesting to read the romance arc in The Purifying Fire as one-sided, as Chandra dancing and feinting around what was essentially a brick wall, possibly that it never even dawned on Gideon what was happening. At least it's how I naturally read it.


Jace Beleren: Heterosexual*
He doesn't need to be gay to be gay for Bolas. Bolas is like evil David Bowie: being attracted to him is just a part of being alive.


Karn: I'm not sure manufactured intelligences are generally sexual beings.


Liliana Vess: Bisexual*
Along with Jace, she's the only current planeswalker who had an explicit canonical romantic relationship. Also see Chandra Nalaar.


Nicol Bolas: Pansexual
I don't think you wander universes and rub shoulders with gods for twenty five thousand years without things like gender and species starting so seem kind of... insubstantial. Even petty. I doubt he'd be wasting time going after love interests or maintaining concubines, but if he did, he probably wouldn't be concerned with what they were as much as who they were.


Nissa Revane: Heterosexual*


Ral Zarek: Someone who has read The Secretist will have a better guess than me.


Tamiyo: Heterosexual*
Due to established evidence seen here.


Tezzeret: Asexual
It's a side effect of the etherium. He might have had an interest before, but not anymore.


*I'm just going to go ahead and assume everything that's ever happened depicted in 5 Color Control is canon.


"The truth resists simplicity."
Some memorable quotes
57461258 wrote:
I know, as a good liberal scholar, that I'm supposed to respect every other belief and culture and what have you that comes along but... at the end of the day, when all is said and done, some things are just plain wrong.
92481331 wrote:
Venser "Ah, Hello Myr. This is the King. Long Time no see. We thought today would be a good day for rolling. The Myr Battlesphere. The Myr. Where the first rolls and the second follows. Roll, roll, roll. For that purpose we went to the bother, the bother of fixing up Mirrodin. The King of the Multiverse going to the bother just for rolling a Myr Battlephere, just for that, we went to the bother."
92126575 wrote:
Heard a joke once: Mare goes to doctor. Says she's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says she feels all alone in a threatening world where even ponies you thought were your friends can't be trusted. Doctor says "Treatment is simple. Go to one of Pinkie Pie's great parties tonight. Party hard. That should pick you up." Mare bursts into tears. Says "But, doctor...I am Pinkie Pie." Good joke. Everypony laughs. Roll on snare drum. Curtains. Fade to black.
69511863 wrote:
Sure, "the average person" might go see Transformers 3 if s/he wants a good story, but that doesn't stop people from making decent movies. Hell, they even managed to make Batman into a respectable movie. "The average" person might like American Idol or Jersey Shore, but people still made The Wire.
57722938 wrote:
I think the people who would sit down and listen to a minstrel reciting Homer, or thought that novels were art, or read poetry were always a minority. It's a common viewpoint that art was better in the past because everyone's forgotten the bad stuff, while we haven't had time to forget the awful stuff that is current.
56738148 wrote:
For almost all Magic fans, the "story" of Ravnica, for example, is that it's a city world with ten guilds -- yes, for most, that's a "story." All but a tiny fraction of the fan base are entirely unaware of an elaborate plot perpetrated by Augustin IV to trick Agrus Kos and Szadek into breaking the Guildpact, thereby enabling the Azorius to take control. Likewise, the vast majority of Magic players don't know who Harbin is, or Nivea, or Al-Hayat, or Feather, or Jared Carthalion, or Rebbec, or Zagorka ... the list goes on and on.
57916198 wrote:
I'm pulling this out of nowhere and it has nothing like fact attached to it, but it cannot be disproven without breaking the fourth wall, and this is going to be my headcanon because it makes perfect sense. I posit [Tamiyo, the Moon Sage] writes the Planeswalker's Guides to planes.
And one more thing...
CANON is the collected events and details of a fictional work that come directly from its author or someone with equal authority to the author. CANNON is a weapon that fires metal balls at a target, usually a structure or a crowd of enemy combatants. Every time you confuse the two, I'm forced to break one of my own fingers.
>Makes a brand new thread
>Immediately leaves and won't come back until Saturday
>Welp
"The truth resists simplicity."
Some memorable quotes
57461258 wrote:
I know, as a good liberal scholar, that I'm supposed to respect every other belief and culture and what have you that comes along but... at the end of the day, when all is said and done, some things are just plain wrong.
92481331 wrote:
Venser "Ah, Hello Myr. This is the King. Long Time no see. We thought today would be a good day for rolling. The Myr Battlesphere. The Myr. Where the first rolls and the second follows. Roll, roll, roll. For that purpose we went to the bother, the bother of fixing up Mirrodin. The King of the Multiverse going to the bother just for rolling a Myr Battlephere, just for that, we went to the bother."
92126575 wrote:
Heard a joke once: Mare goes to doctor. Says she's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says she feels all alone in a threatening world where even ponies you thought were your friends can't be trusted. Doctor says "Treatment is simple. Go to one of Pinkie Pie's great parties tonight. Party hard. That should pick you up." Mare bursts into tears. Says "But, doctor...I am Pinkie Pie." Good joke. Everypony laughs. Roll on snare drum. Curtains. Fade to black.
69511863 wrote:
Sure, "the average person" might go see Transformers 3 if s/he wants a good story, but that doesn't stop people from making decent movies. Hell, they even managed to make Batman into a respectable movie. "The average" person might like American Idol or Jersey Shore, but people still made The Wire.
57722938 wrote:
I think the people who would sit down and listen to a minstrel reciting Homer, or thought that novels were art, or read poetry were always a minority. It's a common viewpoint that art was better in the past because everyone's forgotten the bad stuff, while we haven't had time to forget the awful stuff that is current.
56738148 wrote:
For almost all Magic fans, the "story" of Ravnica, for example, is that it's a city world with ten guilds -- yes, for most, that's a "story." All but a tiny fraction of the fan base are entirely unaware of an elaborate plot perpetrated by Augustin IV to trick Agrus Kos and Szadek into breaking the Guildpact, thereby enabling the Azorius to take control. Likewise, the vast majority of Magic players don't know who Harbin is, or Nivea, or Al-Hayat, or Feather, or Jared Carthalion, or Rebbec, or Zagorka ... the list goes on and on.
57916198 wrote:
I'm pulling this out of nowhere and it has nothing like fact attached to it, but it cannot be disproven without breaking the fourth wall, and this is going to be my headcanon because it makes perfect sense. I posit [Tamiyo, the Moon Sage] writes the Planeswalker's Guides to planes.
And one more thing...
CANON is the collected events and details of a fictional work that come directly from its author or someone with equal authority to the author. CANNON is a weapon that fires metal balls at a target, usually a structure or a crowd of enemy combatants. Every time you confuse the two, I'm forced to break one of my own fingers.
Excuse me, but where have we seen "evidence" Tamyio was straight? All we know is that she is a planeswalking explorer and observer; if anything, she seems asexual to me.
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Shamsiel, this is a headcanon thread, we're playing hard and fast with the canon here.

@Tamiyo; we know all of nothing about her personality and character, so we can't really assume anything about her sexuality.

@Tezzeret; definitely asexual, but it's not because of the etherium. He's always been thoroughly disgusted with most every aspect of being a flesh and blood being, and I doubt sexuality is any different.

@Ral; I'd guess asexual. He doesn't seem to think much of people and is in love with his work. 

@Tibalt; we don't know much, but the act of torturing people might just be his kink. If that is so, I don't seem him going for a person based on their physical sex (hetero/homo/etc) but rather who is the most fun to torture. I'm not sure if there is a word for that, or that I want to know, so I'll stick with being a sick $%&#.

@Sarkhan; people are dumb. Dragons are hawt. Dracosexual
I think we are missing the real question here, and it is this:

What sort of things can Vraska DO with that LOVELY head of hair?

WONKS 4 ETERNITY!!!! ~_O 
Elspeth and Ajani clearly used to have a thing, but their relationship gradually pailed and now they're lapsed moirails... >_> <_< >_>

More later. 
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Oh jam, Keeper, you reminded me of quadrants.
I know what I'm going to do at work today...
 ಠ_ಠ 
Oh please... that answer of Doug is just massive hope bait. A story focusing on some romance? HAHAHA... nice. And can you imagine if they officially announce any of the current planeswalkers to be homosexual? I bet WoTC will cave in, they have not developed a JC Penney level of backing up things like this.

 
I think WOTC might (they have shown awareness to their homsexual and such fans), but big daddy Hasbro may be another story. Also While our little corner of the fandom is pretty open and tolerant, i've found that generally speaking fantasy fans can be a little closed minded. WHile they may want to do it, it may not be a sound business decision (especially using established characters).

But in general I don't care. while it was well written I actuay foud the love subplot in Purifying Fire boring (the rest of the book was good though), even if it was a fun character development thing (and showed a softer side of red's eotions). I don't generally get much into shipping, and I certainly don't have any for magic. I really don't care if there are or are not. Sure it's great if there are (and I fuly support it), but I'd rather have a character that is gay and doesn't mention it really than a poster gay walker for example. it should be done as a side note, not as a defining part of a character. 
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Sure, I’ll get in on this:
 
Show
Ajani Goldmane
-Heterosexual. I don’t see him letting another guy get close enough to hurt him by dying after what happened to his brother. Plus, my head-canon has him and Kemba making adorable kittens together.
 
Nicol Bolas
-Pansexual. Bolas does what Bolas does when Bolas does it, and Bolas probably does it for some dark purpose.
 
Chandra Nalaar
-Heterosexual with “try-sexual tendencies.” Her and Gideon seem like a great pair, though I suspect that if a fun opportunity to try something new arose (or Steve Argyle were involved), Chandra would be the first to jump at the chance and then maybe wallow in a bit of guilt afterwards.
 
Domri Rade
-Heterosexual.  Young boy full of hormones with the power to ‘walk the worlds looking for the finest native green lasses the Multiverse has to offer.  This kid has Kirk written all over him.
 
Elspeth Tirel
-Heterosexual.  Not that I think it will ever come up for her, but I think she’d pair up well with a strong male figure like Gideon or Koth or she may go a completely different route and her time with the Phyrexians and her own self-bashing will leave her open to the likes of Tibalt.
 
Garruk Wildspeaker
-Bisexual.  Garruk strikes me as pure unbridled masculinity in a barrel.  It’s actually quite interesting to me to give his obsession with Liliana a sexual twinge to it, as it plays out in my mind similarly to the relationship Gaston and Belle have in Beauty and the Beast; if Belle was an evil sorceress. I’d also pair up Garruk with Ajani if Ajani was interested.
 
Gideon Jura
-Heterosexual.  To me, Gideon is like the marble fireplace that shelters Chandra’s burning desires and keeps her safe.
 
Jace Beleren
-Jace doesn’t know what he is.  The only reason he may consider himself heterosexual and in a relationship with Liliana at the moment is because he hasn’t erased all trace of her from his mind in some pout-fest yet.
 
Karn
-Karn is a robot.  But, more than that, Karn is the eternal father figure.  I think romantic love is beyond him and I’m sure that his amalgam consciousness of some of Dominaria’s greatest heroes and crazy people, tempered with Xantcha’s heartstone isn’t helping.
 
Koth
-Homosexual.  I wanted Koth to pursue Venser.  Venser is dead, so that’s gone.  Koth strikes me as an “angry sex” kind of guy who really needs someone who disappoints him to love.  Jace would be great for this.
 
Liliana Vess
-Pansexual.  Like Bolas, Liliana strikes me as the kind of person who will do just about anything if there was power to be had for it.  Then do more things just to screw over that last thing she did.
 
Nissa Revane
-Homosexual.  Nissa strikes me as racist, narcissistic, and exclusionary.  Elves are perfect.  Elven women are more perfect.  If she ever makes it to Ravnica, her and Yeva could be a thing. 
 
Ral Zarek
-Heterosexual.  From what little I know about Ral, I see him with the ladies.
 
Sarkhan Vol
-I firmly believe that Sarkhan’s goal in life is to grow up to be a gay dragon.
 
Sorin Markov
-Pansexual.  Like Liliana and Bolas, Sorin strikes me as the kind of person to sleep around with whatever is at hand if the mood strikes him.  Unlike the other two, he does it for fun and diversion, not for power.
 
Tezzeret
-Asexual.  I think Tezzeret’s goal in life is to be a less friendly Karn.
 
Tibalt
-Bisexual.  Tiblat will happily have tortuous sex with anyone, regardless of gender, but I doubt he’d get too far removed from variation of humanity.   I’m not sure if he and Nin would pair well or not.
 
Tamiyo
-Heterosexual.  I like Tamiyo a lot and I’d be willing to bet that there were more than a few lucky moonmen that caught her eye back on Oboro.
  
Venser
-Venser’s dead.  But when he was alive, he was pretty clearly heterosexual.
 
Vraska
-Homosexual.  I’m pretty sure there are no male gorgons.  I’m not 100% on how we get more gorgons, but I’m willing to bet that lesbian snake sex is to blame.  I bet it’s hot.

@mikemearls The office is basically empty this week, which opens up all sorts of possibilities for low shenanigans

@mikemearls In essence, all those arguments I lost are being unlost. Won, if you will. We're doing it MY way, baby.

@biotech66 aren't you the boss anyway? isn't "DO IT OR I FIRE YOU!" still an option?

@mikemearls I think Perkins would throat punch me if I ever tried that. And I'd give him a glowing quarterly review for it.

I actually liked Domri for gay.
I actually liked Domri for gay.



Indeed. I guess people are just too attached to the idea of a stereotypical perverted teenager.
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I actually liked Domri for gay.



Indeed. I guess people are just too attached to the idea of a stereotypical perverted teenager.


Those ideas are not mutually exclusive.

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Yea, teenagers can be perverted and gay. It all depends on what kind of under garments Domri wants to RADE!

(Nyuk nyuk nyuk!)

... I have nothing constructive to add ever, do I?
I actually liked Domri for gay.



Indeed. I guess people are just too attached to the idea of a stereotypical perverted teenager.


Those ideas are not mutually exclusive.



Depends. If you play exactly in the same way - sexual harassment, spying, underwear stealing, for starters - yes.
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Obviously, everyone is bi. 
I hate dogs.
Obviously, everyone is bi. 

Hush! Don't give Keeper any ideas.

After the official forums lost most of their functionality, a once vibrant community of Vorthos was wiped out.The survivors founded a new place to discuss all things concerning with the art, flavor and storylines of Magic: The Gathering. Come join us.

Obviously, everyone is bi. 

Hush! Don't give Keeper any ideas.




EVERYONE x EVERYONE!!!!

"The fuel on which science runs is ignorance. Science is like a hungry furnace that must be fed logs from the forests of ignorance that surround us. In the process, the clearing we call knowledge expands, but the more it expands, the longer its perimeter and the more ignorance comes into view." -Matt Ridley, Genome

Obviously, everyone is bi. 

Hush! Don't give Keeper any ideas.


TOO LATE :D

My shipping wall is going to look like Jackson Pollack had a turgid love affair with late Piet Mondrian.

(I should add them to my shipping wall, come to think of it...)
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My avatar shows I only care about girls, men are boring to me. Also Bolas is definitly gay for himself and nothing else. Don't even try to argue, what do you think he does in his reflection plane?
My avatar shows I only care about girls, men are boring to me. Also Bolas is definitly gay for himself and nothing else. Don't even try to argue, what do you think he does in his reflection plane?

Try on hats?

@mikemearls The office is basically empty this week, which opens up all sorts of possibilities for low shenanigans

@mikemearls In essence, all those arguments I lost are being unlost. Won, if you will. We're doing it MY way, baby.

@biotech66 aren't you the boss anyway? isn't "DO IT OR I FIRE YOU!" still an option?

@mikemearls I think Perkins would throat punch me if I ever tried that. And I'd give him a glowing quarterly review for it.

Correct.
Sure, why not?

Show
Ajani Goldmane
-Heterosexual, Aromantic.  Ajani is walking a path from one of rage and passion (Vengeant), to one of dispassionate enlightenment (Goldmane).  If he emerges as a leader of his people (Caller of the Pride), he's likely to take a mate.
 
Nicol Bolas
-Bolas is the last of his species (Elder dragons) because he killed all the others.  Even pairing with something like Niv would probably be something akin to beastiality for bolas.  I think it's safe to say that if he were interested in procreation, he would have preserved some mate ages ago.  I also think it's safe to say that dragon sexuality is probably nothing like human sexuality
 
Chandra Nalaar
-Heterosexual, but possibly willing to experiment?  She's clearly attracted to males, given her time with Gideon, and I would bet attracted to males primarily.
 
Domri Rade
-I don't care enough to speculate about this guy.
 
Elspeth Tirel
-Doesn't matter, she'd never act on any "Deviant" impulses no matter how natural they are for her.  in QFK's sample chapter she constantly expresses a disdain for men/males, but I'm tempted to go with the opposite of anything QFK suggests and say that if she develops normal romantic feelings, it will be for a man.
 
Garruk Wildspeaker
-Asexual?  Despite the drive to mate being one of the most natural things in any world, I doubt it occurs to Garruk, mostly because I think (the vast majority of) humans just aren't his type.  Oh, he might get along (or get it on) with a Disciple of the Old Ways if he had a chance, but unless we see something like that we're never going to know if he has desire for humans or not
 
Gideon Jura
-Heterosexual.  You may note a pattern -- I doubt you'll find other orientations among white characters as frequently as among those of other colors.  For Gideon in specific, see Chandra, Purifying Fire
 
Jace Beleren
-Probably Heterosexual.  At least attracted to females. (See: Liliana).
 
Karn
-Karn is a robot.  I think that's all that needs to be said here -- he doesn't even have gender.
 
Koth
-  I don't know about Koth, though I don't really see him going both ways: he's on one of the ends of the Kinsey scale, but I couldn't tell you which.  We don't know enough about Vulshok cultural mores, or the character from a source that doesn't stink to high heavens.
 
Liliana Vess
-We know she was in a relationship with jace, so she at least has some willingness/attraction towards males.  From what else we know of Liliana, though, she probably doesn't put too much stock in gender so I'm going to guess more bisexual than anything else.
 
Nissa Revane
-Most likely in my mind to be homosexual. (though her "Chosen" are male in all examples of their art, they are chosen to serve.)  I could see her having a male for the express purpose of spreading the Elven Race (and her line), but I see her as viewing that as an uncomfortable and regrettable state of affiairs, preferring women as companions.
 
Ral Zarek
- I... honestly, do not know all that much about Ral.  I have to admit ignorance.
 
Sarkhan Vol
- Sarkhan is not interested in his own species.  He wants to become a dragon, then do as the dragons do I'd bet.
 
Sorin Markov
- We know Sorin is a supreme narcissist: he created Avacyn in his own image, after all.  So, Sorin Markov's standard of beauty is, it seems to me, Sorin Markov.  He'd probably "enjoy himself" with somebody close regardless of gender, but Sorin is never goign to love anyone the way Sorin loves Sorin.
 
Tezzeret
-Asexual.  Tezz is from Esper, where the ruling caste was pretty clearly AGAINST squishy biological goings-on
 
Tibalt
-Sadist, as defined in the DSM (Sadism, not Sadistic personality disorder).  I don't think it's about gender, physical traits, and attraction for him, it's about dominance and inflicting pain.  Torture probably literally turns him on.
 
Tamiyo
-Heterosexual.  Really, I'm just defaulting to the most common orientation here -- I doubt Tamiyo is interested in a relationship of any kind.  But that's a "right now" issue and if she were (she met the right person, her circumstances changed, or something else), I have a feeling she'd go for a male moonfolk.
  
Venser
-"Venser’s dead.  But when he was alive, he was pretty clearly heterosexual.": I agree.
 
Vraska
-Depends entirely on how Gorgons exist/procreate.  Do they even have orientation as we understand it?  Are they fertilized by spores, or non-gorgon males?  Is there an extremely dimorphic counterpart to the female Gorgon that would be a valid relationship target?

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As a rule, I make it a habit of never trying to guess another's orientation. In most cases, we don't have enough evidence anyway, so it'll just default to what we would "want" them to be.


That being said, this raises another interesting question for me. Have we ever seen a planeswalker with a family? As in, "marrying" someone who wasn't another planeswalker, and having children? Have we ever seen a planeswalker who has borne/sired children? Or are they like Immortals from the Highlander mythos and they can't have children? Is there any evidence of this one way or the other?     

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That being said, this raises another interesting question for me. Have we ever seen a planeswalker with a family? As in, "marrying" someone who wasn't another planeswalker, and having children? Have we ever seen a planeswalker who has borne/sired children?

Yes.  Garth One-Eye most certainly does this.  Urza has as well, though there is some question about the legitimacy of his son (it may have been Mishra's) and that was before he became a 'Walker during the Brother's War.

@mikemearls The office is basically empty this week, which opens up all sorts of possibilities for low shenanigans

@mikemearls In essence, all those arguments I lost are being unlost. Won, if you will. We're doing it MY way, baby.

@biotech66 aren't you the boss anyway? isn't "DO IT OR I FIRE YOU!" still an option?

@mikemearls I think Perkins would throat punch me if I ever tried that. And I'd give him a glowing quarterly review for it.

Oh, man, I can't believe I forgot about Garth. He's one of my favorite characters!

How about post-revisionist? Or post-mending? 

Shameless Self-Promotion

These are the MTG Fiction pieces I have written:

Planes of the Dual-Walkers
Allo's Fortnight
The Butcher's Cleaver
Dead Man 'Walking
Showdown
Pariah
Deals and Devils
The Tears of the Djinn
Cromat Comes
Kiss of the Shorecerers
Numerous poems in The Poetry Plane
Magic: The Musical

Please read and comment! I love hearing people's thoughts and reactions to my work!

Post-Mending, the only 'Walkers that we hear about getting it on are Jace and Liliana.  If Lilly starts to show in the next few blocks, we'll have our answer.

@mikemearls The office is basically empty this week, which opens up all sorts of possibilities for low shenanigans

@mikemearls In essence, all those arguments I lost are being unlost. Won, if you will. We're doing it MY way, baby.

@biotech66 aren't you the boss anyway? isn't "DO IT OR I FIRE YOU!" still an option?

@mikemearls I think Perkins would throat punch me if I ever tried that. And I'd give him a glowing quarterly review for it.

Liliana being "in the family way" would be interesting... and disturbing.

Also, people need to start using that saying again. It's hilarious. 

Shameless Self-Promotion

These are the MTG Fiction pieces I have written:

Planes of the Dual-Walkers
Allo's Fortnight
The Butcher's Cleaver
Dead Man 'Walking
Showdown
Pariah
Deals and Devils
The Tears of the Djinn
Cromat Comes
Kiss of the Shorecerers
Numerous poems in The Poetry Plane
Magic: The Musical

Please read and comment! I love hearing people's thoughts and reactions to my work!

I kinda wanted to make a love story thing based off Romeo and Juliet in a planar war between two old walkers taking place before the mending. Their battle would eventually cause some sort of temporary portal or magic mirror to pop up and two of the royalty on the different planes fall in love. Sex/gender was undecided.
I've said it before. I firmly believe Gatha and Kreig were lovers.

"The fuel on which science runs is ignorance. Science is like a hungry furnace that must be fed logs from the forests of ignorance that surround us. In the process, the clearing we call knowledge expands, but the more it expands, the longer its perimeter and the more ignorance comes into view." -Matt Ridley, Genome

That being said, this raises another interesting question for me. Have we ever seen a planeswalker with a family? As in, "marrying" someone who wasn't another planeswalker, and having children? Have we ever seen a planeswalker who has borne/sired children? Or are they like Immortals from the Highlander mythos and they can't have children? Is there any evidence of this one way or the other?     



Pre-mending walkers didn't have bodies after ascending, so... y'know, hard to make children that way. And if they wanted to, they'd just wish up a child like Serra did for her entire sterile plane.

Sorin, however, has sired a few vampires in his time. From what Brady has told us, they mostly hate him.
Heterosexual.  You may note a pattern -- I doubt you'll find other orientations among white characters as frequently as among those of other colors.  For Gideon in specific, see Chandra, Purifying Fire



Well, I think it's a cheap move (no offense intended).

The phrase seems to imply homosexual characters are intrinsically connected to the concept of sexual freedom/depravacy, which is a very western tradition derived from christian thought. However, to other cultures, homosexual affairs were often seen as more refined: non-athenian greeks saw male homosexuality as a more equal affair than heterosexual relationships, while the Inuit saw homosexuality as the original state. Both are examples of it being considered more "pure" than heterosexuality, and combined with the more familiar roman tendency to use it as a form of social dominance, it seems very compatible with to me.

Now, Ajani is proven to at least like ladies, and Gideon may or may not return Chandra's feelings, but depending on the nature of their cultures they could very well be open to a same-sex affair.

Elspeth, on the other hand, is defenitely repressed, no matter what sexuality she is.
IMAGE(http://www.wizards.com/global/images/mtgcom_daily_mc52_picMain_en.jpg)IMAGE(http://images.community.wizards.com/community.wizards.com/user/blitzschnell/73821e61e013eadf56a8e4e2226d89a3.jpg?v=90000)
Heterosexual.  You may note a pattern -- I doubt you'll find other orientations among white characters as frequently as among those of other colors.  For Gideon in specific, see Chandra, Purifying Fire



Well, I think it's a cheap move (no offense intended).

The phrase seems to imply homosexual characters are intrinsically connected to the concept of sexual freedom/depravacy, which is a very western tradition derived from christian thought. However, to other cultures, homosexual affairs were often seen as more refined: non-athenian greeks saw male homosexuality as a more equal affair than heterosexual relationships, while the Inuit saw homosexuality as the original state. Both are examples of it being considered more "pure" than heterosexuality, and combined with the more familiar roman tendency to use it as a form of social dominance, it seems very compatible with to me.




Beat me to it.
"The real purpose of socialism is precisely to overcome and advance beyond the predatory phase of human development." -Albert Einstein Resident Left Hand of Stalin and Banana Stand Grandstander Half of the Ambiguously Gay Duo House of Trolls, looking for a partner Wondering what happened to the Star Wars forums?
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141722973 wrote:
And it wasn't ****. It was subjectively concensual sex.
57036828 wrote:
Marketing and design are two different things. For instance the snuggy was designed for people in wheel chairs and marketed to people that are too incompetent to operate a blanket.
75239035 wrote:
I personally don't want him decapitated.
141722973 wrote:
And do not call me a Yank. I am a Québecois, basically your better.
And the greatest post moderation of all time...
58115148 wrote:
I gave that (Content Removed) a to-scale Lego replica. (Content Removed) love to-scale Lego replicas. (ORC_Cerberus: Edited - Vulgarity is against the Code of Conduct)
Elspeth, on the other hand, is defenitely repressed, no matter what sexuality she is.


Definitely, but given that, I also think that her total asexuality to this point makes her more open to relationships of both type, meaning that I think once she discovers her own drives, she'd be bisexual due to the previous repression undoing any heteronormativity that she might have been taught.

Plus, Elspeth x Melira.
Elspeth, on the other hand, is defenitely repressed, no matter what sexuality she is.


Definitely, but given that, I also think that her total asexuality to this point makes her more open to relationships of both type, meaning that I think once she discovers her own drives, she'd be bisexual due to the previous repression undoing any heteronormativity that she might have been taught.

Plus, Elspeth x Melira.



I hate using Elspeth for any example because of how damaged she is. Leave the poor girl alone.

"The fuel on which science runs is ignorance. Science is like a hungry furnace that must be fed logs from the forests of ignorance that surround us. In the process, the clearing we call knowledge expands, but the more it expands, the longer its perimeter and the more ignorance comes into view." -Matt Ridley, Genome

Elspeth, on the other hand, is defenitely repressed, no matter what sexuality she is.


Definitely, but given that, I also think that her total asexuality to this point makes her more open to relationships of both type, meaning that I think once she discovers her own drives, she'd be bisexual due to the previous repression undoing any heteronormativity that she might have been taught.

Plus, Elspeth x Melira.



I'd just like to point out that asexuality =/= celibacy. Elspeth might be a chaste, highly repressed bisexual woman, but if she were asexual and in a relationship with anyone she'd be somethingromantic, not stopping being asexual.

At any rate, this offers interesting discussions on how each culture of the planes we know views sexuality. Does the avacynian church tolerate homosexuals, as it is not sexist and homophobia is closely tied to sexism, or do they see it as an aberration? Does Bant peoples see homosexual affairs like ancient greeks did, or do they follow the more medieval route?
IMAGE(http://www.wizards.com/global/images/mtgcom_daily_mc52_picMain_en.jpg)IMAGE(http://images.community.wizards.com/community.wizards.com/user/blitzschnell/73821e61e013eadf56a8e4e2226d89a3.jpg?v=90000)
Elspeth, on the other hand, is defenitely repressed, no matter what sexuality she is.


Definitely, but given that, I also think that her total asexuality to this point makes her more open to relationships of both type, meaning that I think once she discovers her own drives, she'd be bisexual due to the previous repression undoing any heteronormativity that she might have been taught.

Plus, Elspeth x Melira.



I'd just like to point out that asexuality =/= celibacy. Elspeth might be a chaste, highly repressed bisexual woman, but if she were asexual and in a relationship with anyone she'd be somethingromantic, not stopping being asexual.

At any rate, this offers interesting discussions on how each culture of the planes we know views sexuality. Does the avacynian church tolerate homosexuals, as it is not sexist and homophobia is closely tied to sexism, or do they see it as an aberration? Does Bant peoples see homosexual affairs like ancient greeks did, or do they follow the more medieval route?



The bolded is important because THE CULTURES DO NOT HAVE VIEWS ON SEXUALITY. All of you people are expressing opinions on the topic as if Alara or Innistrad was real. Maybe Dominarians hate homosexuals. Do you know? No. And you never will. Christ this entire topic is pretentious as hell.

"The fuel on which science runs is ignorance. Science is like a hungry furnace that must be fed logs from the forests of ignorance that surround us. In the process, the clearing we call knowledge expands, but the more it expands, the longer its perimeter and the more ignorance comes into view." -Matt Ridley, Genome

Elspeth, on the other hand, is defenitely repressed, no matter what sexuality she is.


Definitely, but given that, I also think that her total asexuality to this point makes her more open to relationships of both type, meaning that I think once she discovers her own drives, she'd be bisexual due to the previous repression undoing any heteronormativity that she might have been taught.

Plus, Elspeth x Melira.



I'd just like to point out that asexuality =/= celibacy. Elspeth might be a chaste, highly repressed bisexual woman, but if she were asexual and in a relationship with anyone she'd be somethingromantic, not stopping being asexual.

At any rate, this offers interesting discussions on how each culture of the planes we know views sexuality. Does the avacynian church tolerate homosexuals, as it is not sexist and homophobia is closely tied to sexism, or do they see it as an aberration? Does Bant peoples see homosexual affairs like ancient greeks did, or do they follow the more medieval route?



The bolded is important because THE CULTURES DO NOT HAVE VIEWS ON SEXUALITY. All of you people are expressing opinions on the topic as if Alara or Innistrad was real. Maybe Dominarians hate homosexuals. Do you know? No. And you never will. Christ this entire topic is pretentious as hell.



Who's the little fun-spoiling edgy nihilist? Yes you are.

Yes, they don't exist, but we can still speculate based on data we have. We may never have direct information, but we can still see traits on what little we have. For example, we know Jace's home culture was probably at least residually homophobic given his highly defensive denial.
IMAGE(http://www.wizards.com/global/images/mtgcom_daily_mc52_picMain_en.jpg)IMAGE(http://images.community.wizards.com/community.wizards.com/user/blitzschnell/73821e61e013eadf56a8e4e2226d89a3.jpg?v=90000)
Elspeth, on the other hand, is defenitely repressed, no matter what sexuality she is.


Definitely, but given that, I also think that her total asexuality to this point makes her more open to relationships of both type, meaning that I think once she discovers her own drives, she'd be bisexual due to the previous repression undoing any heteronormativity that she might have been taught.

Plus, Elspeth x Melira.



I'd just like to point out that asexuality =/= celibacy. Elspeth might be a chaste, highly repressed bisexual woman, but if she were asexual and in a relationship with anyone she'd be somethingromantic, not stopping being asexual.

At any rate, this offers interesting discussions on how each culture of the planes we know views sexuality. Does the avacynian church tolerate homosexuals, as it is not sexist and homophobia is closely tied to sexism, or do they see it as an aberration? Does Bant peoples see homosexual affairs like ancient greeks did, or do they follow the more medieval route?



The bolded is important because THE CULTURES DO NOT HAVE VIEWS ON SEXUALITY. All of you people are expressing opinions on the topic as if Alara or Innistrad was real. Maybe Dominarians hate homosexuals. Do you know? No. And you never will. Christ this entire topic is pretentious as hell.



Who's the little fun-spoiling edgy nihilist? Yes you are.

Yes, they don't exist, but we can still speculate based on data we have. We may never have direct information, but we can still see traits on what little we have. For example, we know Jace's home culture was probably at least residually homophobic given his highly defensive denial.



My being a fun-spoiling edgy nihilist isn't remotely relevant to this topic.

What "traits"? We have some info on Jace and Lili. As for the rest of them it's the most baseless of baseless speculation.

Also, don't you have another poorly written story to post?

"The fuel on which science runs is ignorance. Science is like a hungry furnace that must be fed logs from the forests of ignorance that surround us. In the process, the clearing we call knowledge expands, but the more it expands, the longer its perimeter and the more ignorance comes into view." -Matt Ridley, Genome

Jivan, I respect your intellect. I really do. And I get that you don't give a flying circus about how any of us think or feel. Which I also respect; I know a lot of people like you, and some of them are my good friends.

I also appreciate your cynicism, atheism, and nihilism. These are all things I understand, and I can't say I have a problem with you believing in them.

But the way you force it down everyone else's throat is real pretention, and I am going to have to stop you at hypocrisy.

Just as your edgy fun-spoiling is not relevant to the topic, neither is the quality of Shamsiel's writing. Please be polite.
Elspeth, on the other hand, is defenitely repressed, no matter what sexuality she is.


Definitely, but given that, I also think that her total asexuality to this point makes her more open to relationships of both type, meaning that I think once she discovers her own drives, she'd be bisexual due to the previous repression undoing any heteronormativity that she might have been taught.

Plus, Elspeth x Melira.



I'd just like to point out that asexuality =/= celibacy. Elspeth might be a chaste, highly repressed bisexual woman, but if she were asexual and in a relationship with anyone she'd be somethingromantic, not stopping being asexual.

At any rate, this offers interesting discussions on how each culture of the planes we know views sexuality. Does the avacynian church tolerate homosexuals, as it is not sexist and homophobia is closely tied to sexism, or do they see it as an aberration? Does Bant peoples see homosexual affairs like ancient greeks did, or do they follow the more medieval route?



The bolded is important because THE CULTURES DO NOT HAVE VIEWS ON SEXUALITY. All of you people are expressing opinions on the topic as if Alara or Innistrad was real. Maybe Dominarians hate homosexuals. Do you know? No. And you never will. Christ this entire topic is pretentious as hell.



Who's the little fun-spoiling edgy nihilist? Yes you are.

Yes, they don't exist, but we can still speculate based on data we have. We may never have direct information, but we can still see traits on what little we have. For example, we know Jace's home culture was probably at least residually homophobic given his highly defensive denial.



My being a fun-spoiling edgy nihilist isn't remotely relevant to this topic.

What "traits"? We have some info on Jace and Lili. As for the rest of them it's the most baseless of baseless speculation.

Also, don't you have another poorly written story to post?




For someone stressing empirical thought, you don't seem to know concepts like analysis of personal interactions. That alone offers a lot of clues.

Also, really? That's the best come back you could think off? Instead of actually showing why this is a supposedly "pretentious" analysis, you resort to petty insults? My, I am so disappointed.

BTW, not that I like to brag, but I've won several story competitions previously. You might desire to not project your envy.
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