Count Chocula AKA Ghost Dad 3.0 AKA the coolest Standard deck you don't know about

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I'm Lukifell, although my forum name seems to have changed. I usually post crazy/weird decks. I've had three first place wins and two second place wins with this at FNM. Now people are starting to side against it.

Step 1) Play your bears, beat if possible.

Step 2) Stall for as long as you can, doing as much damage as possible. Against control, you can often manage to get an Aristocrat, Blood Artist and Guildmage on the table. If you do, activate Guildmage at EOT to drain them for a lot, then IS on your turn for the win.

Step 3) Failing that, run IS when after you've sacrificed most of your army as speedbumps and they are mostly in the graveyard. If you have a Guildmage on the table, wait until your next turn to drain. If they sweep on their turn, then of course sac everything to Aristocrat.

Guildmage's second ability is insane with Blood Artist triggers. It stacks with multiple uses, so a single Guildmage in play can be used twice (for 6 mana) making Blood Artist ping for 3 each time, per Blood Artist. This can easily get out of hand dealing 50+ damage all for 6 mana. Realistically though, these conditions won't usually be met.

so what do you do when they play a flyer? or a planeswalker? you should probably add some kind of removal that isn't creature based 
so what do you do when they play a flyer? or a planeswalker? you should probably add some kind of removal that isn't creature based 

Yeah, valid points, not too many flying creatures in my meta. I'm testing it out on MWS and running the 1/1 white tap guy.

Anyway, this deck is super fun to play while not being completely uncompetitive... have a try.
I may be missing something but how does activating the Aristocrat twice make each sac deal 3 manage with BA? By my count that is still only two creatures dead so only two damage. 
Sorry, I meant, activating the Guildmage.

If you have six mana, you can activate it twice. Then, each time a Blood Artist triggers, you'll ping them for 1 and gain 1 life. So each time you activate Guildmage's second ability, it amplifies Blood Artist damage by 1.

Obviously you won't always have those creatures on the board nor the mana to use them, but basically in this deck, Guildmage is a 2/2 bear that becomes a huge threat late game.

Experimenting with the following...
Avacynian Priest
Skirsdag High Priest
Deranged Assistant 

I don't think this can become competitive because it's so easy to shut down with graveyard hate and sweepers. But I've been going almost even with most tier one decks, and generally beating midrange. Needs a lot of tweaking but hopefully, if anyone out there likes this and wants to test and experiment, will chime in with feedback.
Some notes: 

* Blood Artist is really deceptive in regards to how much damage it can do, especially with Guildmage (What? I just took 36? How?)

* Aristocrat's protection is really handy, don't forget about it

* Flying creatures suck, is Fog Bank a possible include?

* If you have an Immortal Servitude in hand and they're at low life, swinging into them with all of your dorks, saccing the ones they block to Blood Artist, then using IS and saccing everything again, can randomly win games and does a ton of damage.

* If you have any Augurs on the table, make sure to chump block with them before you use Immortal Servitude, because you'll recur their Ponder ability, letting you get to more Servitudes faster
I would like to see some creatures with better EtB triggers to better abuse Immortal Servitude; I really like Ravenous Rats because you're in black, but there may be better options than that.
At 2CMC, there really aren't any options.
Augur, Rats, Skaab. War Priest of Thune but he'll probably not hit much. Snapcaster Mage. Azorius Arrester.
If you go into Green there's Elvish Visionary, Gatecreeper Vine, or Timberland Guide... but that doesn't mean they're worth using at all.
Syndic of Tithes is a solid 4-of. Extort will always be relevant with such a low and predictable curve. I kinda like 1-2 Increasing Ambition to fetch Guildmages or IS, to make the deck a bit more consistent. Shame there isn't a cheaper tutor in standard.

Is :U: really necessary? 
Standard Pauper! (play it on MTGO)
Blue isn't necessary.

Trying out an almost all-humans build, WGB, with Mayor of Avabruck, Hamlet Captain and Gavony Township. Stronger overall, but not as combo-y or explosive, but can win easier if they play graveyard hate and doesn't rely on "getting ridiculous" with the Blood Artist combo.

I hope this is looked into more guys, the interaction between Blood Artist and Vizkopa Guildmage is really strong. I searched and there was a previous thread about this on another website last month but the builds they were using were all wrong.

I've been pondering this with green over blue for Elvish Visionary and Deadly Recluse. Also Blind Obedience Syndic of Tithes and Basilica Screecher make the list as extorters for another angle of attack and along with Creeping Renaissance, Treasured Find and Revive as recursion (revive being more of a gimmick looping a 2nd copy to extort). Not sure what there is room for. Korozda Guildmage seems to have potential also, getting bloodthrone past blockers or sacking dudes for more dudes. Finally Harvester of Souls and Soul of the Harvest seem like they could be a huge deal late.

What you're missing is Bloodthrone Vampire, Dying Wish, Murder Investigation, gross mass removal, Thrull Parasite and Orzhov Charm (I would include Increasing Devotion over Murder Investigation, but some people like symmetry with Dying Wish)
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This is perhaps not weird enough, but why Butcher Ghoul over Geralf's Messenger? Just a colored mana issue?
Mana cost 2 so it can come back en-mass with the other creatures when we Immortal Servitude.
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