I killed the game (I think), so now what?

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A little background before I get to the actual event.  Been playing in an Eberron game for some time now, and things have been a little rocky.  The DM is still not used to running a 4e game, and there have been a few discussions about monster design, rules, treasure, and xp awards between the players and the DM.

Overall, the game has been fun enough to keep coming back, even though the DM is a little heavy-handed about his game- it's a combination of a more old-school approach to DMing, plus not wanting to "lose control" of his game.  I keep telling the guy not to worry, the game is fairly low-optimization, but he had a previous gaming group roll right over him, and it's obvious it wasn't a pleasant experience.

Our current adventure had us investigating an odd religious sect in Sharn, and a lot of what they were doing seemed shady.  When we were sent to confront the leader of the sect, we found that he'd left for a chapel outside the city.  When we encountered a group of sect members on the road, one of the party members referred to them as a "cult", and that set them off- combat ensued, and they didn't seem to want to give quarter.

In the heat of the moment, we killed the lot of them (a mistake, I admit).  The whole encounter seemed very off, and we realized something was very wrong here.  The Bard decided we should at least return the fallen to their brethren.

When we got to the chapel, however, the guards attacked us the instant they saw their dead, before I could even try to explain.  They fought to the death, leaving us with more bodies...and more questions.

Entering the chapel, the leader of the sect, upon seeing us, ordered his flock to attack.  It was a tough fight, including enemies with at-will dominate and stun powers.  Our characters aren't built to deal with that very well, and the enemies seemed bound and determined to wrest control of our Sorcerer and make him attack us- I should point out that his damage is a lot nastier than the enemies we fight at our level.

After the session, we explained to the DM that at-will Dominate is fairly extreme, especially given that it A) doesn't let us play our characters, and B) the damage we can deal can be quite lethal.

We'd had problems with this sort of thing before, as the DM seems to feel hard control on the PC's is a perfectly acceptable tactic.  I personally don't feel that it should never happen, but it's very frustrating, and tends to make combats longer and more lethal than they really need to be.

This time, however, the DM claimed to understand our concerns, and we felt assured that things would be better moving forward.

This session: we entered the basement of the chapel, and were confronted with a new enemy.  There was one round where most of the party took heavy damage due to a combination of an area burst and a close burst, but other than that, it went smoothly.  I finished the elite off with the last of my daily attack powers.

Then the DM said "the guy doesn't drop.  Instead he wanders away from you, monologuing about how this is impossible, how he cannot lose this way.  The party can spend a healing surge and regain one encounter power before the fight continues."

So basically, a cutscene where the PC's stand around like dopes.  Then the guy transforms into a solo monster, who immediately tells the party that we should flee and we will be spared his coming wrath.

Naturally, we're defiant, which seems to surprise the DM.  In fact, he kept pointing out that we could flee, but given that the enemys' first salvo slowed the whole party with a close burst 10 (?!) attack, we really didn't think we COULD get away from him.  Then he cursed our Sorcerer- the curse said that the solo could use the sorcerer's square to determine line of sight and effect with the solo's powers and his aura.

The monster decimated the party in short order.  His close burst 10 made the characters lose two healing surges and slowed them until they spent a surge.  He dominated the Sorcerer at one point, who then proceeded to crit the Ranger, killing him instantly.  With only being allowed to recover one power, the Bard ran out of healing fast, and by round two, we were swinging at wills at the enemy- who then revealed he had an interrupt to make an at-will attack automatically miss.

I got him down to about 50 hit points before he KO'd me.  The rest of the party was dead, and I was dying, with no surges left, so death was inevitable.  I was stunned by the turn of events.  The DM kept saying that "we should have run" and that "it's not my fault, I didn't design the monster, it's a homebrew some other guy made that I thought looked cool".

I told him that I was done, and the others followed suit.  So now the game is toast, and I have no idea what to do now.                             
"You can always judge a man by the quality of his enemies." -The Doctor, Remembrance of the Daleks
It sounds on its surface like a DM who wants specific story outcomes to occur regardless of the players' choices. A game can work like that, but only works well with player buy-in, which it's clear he doesn't have. 

You might be able to do a "reset" here and start fresh after a discussion about how the DM is choosing to run his game. Either you'll agree with it and support his approach, you can ask him to change his approach (unlikely), or you can part ways. 
It sounds to me like this DM is doing a DM vs. Players thing here. From what you wrote it sounds to me like your party was could have gotten information from the sect members you met on the road so it was indeed unfortunate that you killed them all. However, with the DM attacking your party "without quarter" as you stated he is leaving you will less choices. If he wanted you to have information from those sect members he could have done several things.

First off the sect members didn't "have to" attack just because someone insulted them. They could've been pissed off by that and been less forth coming with information, but it didn't have to lead to a fight. If the DM did want you to fight them fine, but when he was down to 1 or 2 of them left, facing off against a party that had taken out the others from the group he could have had the remaining member(s) surrender and offer to tell you anything in exchange for their life.

Also, and this is where I find the most fault in how the DM handled things, Sure he wanted to try out a cool homebrew monster that he found out about, but obviously it was way too overpowered for your party. As a DM he should learn to expect the unexpected from his players. If he puts a BBEG in the party's path, sure they have the option to run away, but they also have the option to fight. He needs to expect that what he thinks the party should do is not necessarily what they're going to do.

He expected the party to run, and in fact, by the build of this monster that seems to have be the ONLY choice for your party to survive. There should never be only ONE choice for the party. No matter the situation there should be several choices that can be made. Additionally, a TPK in this instance is obviously not a fun and interesting consequence to failing. If the DM wants to use such a monster that is obviously overpowered for the party that is fine, but he needs to come up with other possible ways to "win" that encounter other than bringing the monster down to zero HP.

He could have also just ended things once you had originally taken down the first form of the BBEG. You said that he had the BBEG turn around a walk away a little bit before changing and then decimating your party. He could have still had the guy turn around and start to walk away but then escape out the back door yelling "I'll get you for this my little pretties, and your little dog too." Or just teleport out of there, or any number of other possibilities so that he could still be a recurring villian.

Also, your group had already spoken to him about dominating type effects and how that was not something that was "in any way" interesting to your group. That it basically took the fun out of the game because now that player just basically has to sit there while his character is being played by the DM and killing off other party members. Then he still went and used a creature that did that very thing to you.

Final thought here. If you want this game to keep going you and the other players need to sit down with the DM and communicate about things. Let him know what things you find enjoyable in his campaign, but also let him know what you guys don't like. If he all of you handle this maturely then you can all work together to make this an enjoyable campaign for all and not run into these kinds of situations. However, if the DM isn't willing to take constructive criticism and learn and grow as a DM (you and the other players need to be able take constructive criticism too so that you can work together) then it might be time for someone else to run a game, or for you all to find/join another group.
Good advice, jplay36. I do have to nitpick on one thing though which may be helpful if this group does approach the DM to make suggestions and move forward.

I don't think it's a good idea for the DM to create challenges for the PCs and also create solutions. This creates a lot of problems, as evidenced by just this single example. The DM created a challenge, presented it, and gave the PCs a solution: Run. The PCs didn't do that, even when he vocalized that solution as a viable option. Possibly even the only viable option.

Now, imagine I created 5 different solutions for dealing with that challenge. And then the players didn't figure them out or did figure them out but didn't employ them. Same result, except the DM now has wasted effort by his contingency planning. Or worse, he blocks every other player idea because he needs them to do one of the 5 things he's got planned as solutions. It's not hard for even experienced DMs to trap themselves in this way. This thread perfectly illustrates why the DM shouldn't come up with or even suggest solutions.

So, my advice is that DMs create challenges but no predetermined solutions. Allow room for the players to be creative and move beyond thinking just about their powers. Let the players figure out how to win, and say "Yes, and..." to their solutions and permit the dice to determine whether their solution works. Of course, this is really DM advice, but it applies to players too in the sense that they should expect that they can solve a given challenge more than one way. Look beyond your character sheets and imagine the fiction of the scene. The solutions will present themselves. Be creative and encourage your DM to say "Yes, and..." to you by saying "Yes, and..." to his ideas in return.

If it were me, I'd have tried to cause the ceiling of the basement to collapse on the BBEG and rolled out of there at the last second... and grabbed my hat, of course. That might have been an impromptu skill challenge and would have been a cinematic end, one way or another.

Yuck sounds like a cluster-F’n to me.


But I always try to follow one rule, regardless of how a game goes; Keep playing.


Follow the advice above, you all need to sit down and talk about what you didn’t like about the game; and then just let it drop, roll up some new characters and start a new adventure.


If this same thing keeps happening, the DM sooner or later will..


A)     Get POed your characters aren’t dancing to his tune


B)      Learn his lesson and become a better DM.


You just have to hope for B, and if you get A, just keep making new characters till he eventually sees the light and does a B. The alternative is to just not play, which I find depressing since you never know how long till you can organize another game.


ALSO it seems like your DM is making two problems which you need to address.


1)      A DM is suppose to keep his story Fluid enough that the PC’s determine what happens, not a script.


2)      A DM has the privilege to cheese on rolls if his monsters turn out way more powerful then he intended, or to break items which are too overpowered for PCs to have.


Some people might disagree with #2, but  the role of the DM is not to kill the PCs, and saying you placed to tough a monster on accident isn’t a good excuse for getting a Party killed; he should have realized you where doomed when the last fight started and Role Played a way for your characters to win/escape.

IMAGE(http://www.nodiatis.com/pub/1.jpg)

But I always try to follow one rule, regardless of how a game goes; Keep playing.

I'm the opposite.  No D&D is better than bad D&D.

OD&D, 1E and 2E challenged the player. 3E challenged the character, not the player. Now 4E takes it a step further by challenging a GROUP OF PLAYERS to work together as a TEAM. That's why I love 4E.

"Your ability to summon a horde of celestial superbeings at will is making my ... BMX skills look a bit redundant."

"People treat their lack of imagination as if it's the measure of what's silly. Which is silly." - Noon

"Challenge" is overrated.  "Immersion" is usually just a more pretentious way of saying "having fun playing D&D."

"Falling down is how you grow.  Staying down is how you die.  It's not what happens to you, it's what you do after it happens.”

I do appreciate all the replies.  Honestly, I'm not sure what to do.  The DM has asked me to give him another chance, and help him rally the players.  And I want to keep playing, but I have a lot of mixed feelings about what happened.  I don't need the game to always go my way, but I believe that it's possible to challenge players and still let them have fun.  But I haven't been having much fun, and being TPK'd by an overpowered solo is definitely a killjoy.

And yet, the sad part is, if we'd been allowed to have a real short rest, we probably would have won, despite the fact that the solo was three levels higher than our party. 
"You can always judge a man by the quality of his enemies." -The Doctor, Remembrance of the Daleks
That was a killer-DM move he made, by having you fight against monsters who had a dominate At-Will, and then immediately follow up with a solo monster 3 levels above you. Sorry, that is lame.

Maybe come back together and do some round-robin DMing that way your killer-DM is not always on the other side of the table. This will also allow other players to craft adventures or encounters that they would like to run. 
Metafictional said...

"The DM has asked me to give him another chance, and help him rally the players."


This statement says a lot.  This statement tells me that the DM realized that he may have made a mistake and was at least partly culpable for what happened.  It says to me that he may be willing to listen to what you and the other players have to say at this point in order to keep playing the game.

This, IMO, is now a golden opportunity for you and the other players.  This is your chance to sit down with the DM as a group and let him know how you feel that things have been going.  Tell him what things you all agree need to change to make it more fun for you guys as players.  Also tell him what things that you absolutely LOVE that he's been doing. (spoonful of sugar and all that).

Communicate with him and let him know that all of you are willing to work with him to make for an enjoyable and memorable campaign that you will talk about for years to come, but make sure that he understands that you guys need to meet each other half-way.  He has to be willing to make adjustments for the good of the group and you guys may also have to make some adjustments.

The big thing here is to use this as an opportunity to communicate with each other, and all of you can grow as DM and Players respectively, and perhaps have even better adventures from here on out.
Metafictional said...

"The DM has asked me to give him another chance, and help him rally the players."


This statement says a lot.  This statement tells me that the DM realized that he may have made a mistake and was at least partly culpable for what happened.  It says to me that he may be willing to listen to what you and the other players have to say at this point in order to keep playing the game.

This, IMO, is now a golden opportunity for you and the other players.  This is your chance to sit down with the DM as a group and let him know how you feel that things have been going.  Tell him what things you all agree need to change to make it more fun for you guys as players.  Also tell him what things that you absolutely LOVE that he's been doing. (spoonful of sugar and all that).

Communicate with him and let him know that all of you are willing to work with him to make for an enjoyable and memorable campaign that you will talk about for years to come, but make sure that he understands that you guys need to meet each other half-way.  He has to be willing to make adjustments for the good of the group and you guys may also have to make some adjustments.

The big thing here is to use this as an opportunity to communicate with each other, and all of you can grow as DM and Players respectively, and perhaps have even better adventures from here on out.



This x10000.  Here's your chance.  Do your best with it. 

OD&D, 1E and 2E challenged the player. 3E challenged the character, not the player. Now 4E takes it a step further by challenging a GROUP OF PLAYERS to work together as a TEAM. That's why I love 4E.

"Your ability to summon a horde of celestial superbeings at will is making my ... BMX skills look a bit redundant."

"People treat their lack of imagination as if it's the measure of what's silly. Which is silly." - Noon

"Challenge" is overrated.  "Immersion" is usually just a more pretentious way of saying "having fun playing D&D."

"Falling down is how you grow.  Staying down is how you die.  It's not what happens to you, it's what you do after it happens.”

Maybe this is just a coincidence, but is Rood.Inverse your DM? Similar thread?
Wow.  Yes, he is.  I had no idea he'd made a thread as well.  I really do want to give him another chance, but I'm not sure how the other players will feel.
"You can always judge a man by the quality of his enemies." -The Doctor, Remembrance of the Daleks
But I always try to follow one rule, regardless of how a game goes; Keep playing.

I'm the opposite.  No D&D is better than bad D&D.


Bad pizza is still pizza, but bad sushi... i dunno.
A rogue with a bowl of slop can be a controller. WIZARD PC: Can I substitute Celestial Roc Guano for my fireball spells? DM: Awesome. Yes. When in doubt, take action.... that's generally the best course. Even Sun Tsu knew that, and he didn't have internets.
Not a single protection from evil in the party, huh?
A rogue with a bowl of slop can be a controller. WIZARD PC: Can I substitute Celestial Roc Guano for my fireball spells? DM: Awesome. Yes. When in doubt, take action.... that's generally the best course. Even Sun Tsu knew that, and he didn't have internets.
Sadly, it's a 4e game, so no.  I do miss that spell, I remember making a DM very angry with my Cleric when I used it to block a Vampire's domination...those were the days.
"You can always judge a man by the quality of his enemies." -The Doctor, Remembrance of the Daleks
As a Newbie DM I say give him another shot...at least he understands he messed up...Like you said he is still getting used to 4e...and if I have klearn't nothing else from DMing I have learn't that it is something you can not learn only from a book...you need to run a campaine and learn from mistakes...I am thankful I have a great group of players who understand when I screw something up or figure out a new rule that I didn't know before...Just explaine to him that there are some issues with what he is doing and try to help him become a better DM...
Sadly, it's a 4e game, so no.  I do miss that spell, I remember making a DM very angry with my Cleric when I used it to block a Vampire's domination...those were the days.

A rogue with a bowl of slop can be a controller. WIZARD PC: Can I substitute Celestial Roc Guano for my fireball spells? DM: Awesome. Yes. When in doubt, take action.... that's generally the best course. Even Sun Tsu knew that, and he didn't have internets.
My group has been rotating players and DM for the past 15 years or so. We've found that that works really well in preventing DM vs. Players type situations from developing.

5e should strongly stay away from "I don't like it, so you can't have it either."

 

I once asked the question (in D&D 3.5) "Does a Druid4/Wizard3/ArcaneHierophant1 have Wildshape?". Jesse Decker and Andy Collins: Yes and the text is clear and can't be interpreted differently. Rich Redman and Ed Stark: No and the text is clear and can't be interpreted differently. Skip Williams: Lol, it's worded ambiguously and entirely not how I intended it. (Cust. Serv. Reference# 050815-000323)

I understand how you feel, we have in our group a similar DM.

He is pretty new to Dm'ing, so most of the time we come accross funny and silly situations, but in the end there is one thing i and the others noticed, is that nothing goes has he had planned, and i keep tellin ghim that he needs to be more flexible or at least be good at improvising.

What happened is that due to scenario plots, my character was separated from the rest of the group, off to some assassination mission taken for a rich noble for lots of golds, i had to kill a woman who was actually a eye withness of some bad thing where my employer whas involved, she was taken y the guards an put in the Citadel cells for her protection, the guard at the gate was paid to let me in.

I then proceed to her cell, and i then said that i open the door, and inspect the cell, he tells me that i see nothing, the cell is empty, i then say that i search the cell thoroughly to find clues, he tells me that i don't see anything...

I then end up running into the Guards recruiter, who question why i'm here, and we end up fighting, in the end i killed 12 guards and a Demi-boss with my Vryloka Blackguard, i then go back in the cells to find a way to escape, and then the woman i seeked jump at me and try to attack me...

I'm a little WTF at the moment," where di she come from?" "She whas hiding behind the door in the cell..."..., we then argue that i distincly said that i searched the whole cell for clues, and that i din't find her despite being in the same room has her?"

While the other group members went off on some dungeon crawl.

in the end i surrendered, because there was no ends to the Guards flow, and he admitted that if i did not surrender, he will keep throwing guards at me until i died...

He then said that normaly this would have taken only a few minutes, that i would have rejoined the group and went to the dungeon crawl with them, and then another memeber of the group pointed that he made me depart to this mission without saying what i was doing, and that they received their mission from the npc well after i was gone, he then proceed to say "yeah but they was a note leftat the tavern for him to find you guys yadda, yadda, yadda..."

I do not need to say i was pissed.

I get out of jail and i regroup with the band, we ned at the inn, and a NPc comes up and give us a new quest (Ashencrown campaign), we spend the night, and then he says that i wake up in a basement, i'm chained to the wall, and that i see my employer who isn't satisfied about my work, and had to send an assassin to kill her in my stead.

I am then obligated to fullfil another task for him, so once again i'm sperated from the rest of the group, and for the next 6 hours, i din't do anything, but watch the other group finish the dungeon crawl they started the day before, while i was send off in some far away valley...

A few times i asked him what i was up to, he said " you are still travelling with the group you are, you did fight off some beasts and goblins on the road, you get xxx XP's", and then proceeded back with the other group...

So no only whas i once again separated from the group, but i did nothing for a whole 7 hours gaming session, then watch the others play...

I had an argument with him, he then admitted that it took logner then what he expected, and i told him, once again, that nothing a Dm plans goes the right way, he then give me some extra Xp's and gold as a compensation.

The next session i couldn't be present because of work, so i left several messages on our forums, and told the players and DM personnaly when i saw them at our gaming club, that for the next 2 sessions i couldn't be playing, they said okay and all.

So when you tell them more then 5 times that you arn't here, your character isn't supposed to take part in anything, correct?...

Well for some odd reasons, they though that if they played a different day, i might be coming, wich din't occure, because iw as still working.

So thay where waiting for me, none of them had the presence of mind to call me, and the DM who have my cell number din't have his phone with him, so they only though that i wasn't going to show up.

So what happened is that their group and the group i was travelling with, ended up in each other, the mission i was gived ny the employer turns out to be an ambush on my comrades group...

The Dm then play my character, based only on the stats and list of powers/items i did put on the forums, and did not bother to print my character sheet to make full us of it, i end up charging the guy of the group who can make all the odds lies, he make on 10 rolls 7 20's...

So i charge and attack him, the Dm gets a crit, he decids that a crit would be too much, so he rerolls, and get another crit...

So i'm a Charge chassis Blackguard with a Fullblade..., the amount of damage was enough that the guy had to roll for Death save, he succeded, and from this point on, they all though that i was the Boss...

i let you imagine how it ended..., its only after the fight that the DM admitted that it was my character, and while he said that, one of our comrade has the Forger background so he proceeds to de-enchant all my items for dust...

We have a "ressurect" systeme, where you meet the Grim reaper, he give you a riddle, if you succed, you come back to life, but even if i do this, i will be completly naked and with no items, and seeing that they allready shared the loot and the dust, i don't think they will be okay to simply say" okay so we cancel what happened and give back your items".

In his mind, in the figth they would have recognize me, or i would, then we would join all against the group of assassins and end of the matter.

But i only had the surprise round where he crited with my toon, and then the following turn i was dead, because they ganged on me, in one turn i turned from 65 Hp's to -86hp's..

So yeah, i'm stuck to reroll..., you have no idea how hard i wanted to smack him in the face, specially has he knew i was working so no matter the day they played i couldn't make it...

So yeah, i get how you feel, with a DM who can't make things works in other ways then how he planned it, and even what he planned sometimes doesn't work.

@Chaosrex
Wow that sucks, you need to be firm with your group (and DM) and tell them you don’t appreciate them using your character without you being there, and I would demand that you get your stuff back.


Sounds like your DM just blows tbh, I don’t think a DM should run players characters who are not there (especially without given consent.)


I can tell you upright, if a DM played my character when I wans’t there without my permission and the next week he told me my toon had died and I have to restart; I’d tell him to go fu@k himself and quit the game outright.


Sounds like your DM and your Party doesn’t have any respect for you.  I would highly recommend revenge, if your DM feels he can kill your character without even being there, kill his story, if your players think it’s okay for the DM to do things like this (And help along) find ways to kill their characters.

IMAGE(http://www.nodiatis.com/pub/1.jpg)

Thanks, but the thing is that he is a good friend, and contrary to what the others decided( not telling me until i came for the next session) he told me what had happened so that i will be prepared,and at first i did ask him to ressurect my toon with the belognings, but the thing is that in another campaign where my character also died, it was brought back.

The story is that my character had his throat slit during his sleep, and the dmgs was outright high enough that i would instantly die witout any death save.

But an hour earlier i had said to the Dm that i was buying a reinforced belt, but then we started discussion something else game or anime/cartoon related(geeks togheter...), and he completly forgot to give me the item card, and i to note that i had bought the belt.

And that Dm is really obtuse, but seeing that he allready did some nice stuffs for my character, like homebrew items, i ended the discusion about the belt.

But he told us a few days before that he will stop this campaign at lvl 20-ish and make a new one, but in this one, its PHB 1,2,3 races/classes/themes etc only..., to get something from another book you must win a quiz of some sort, and, i'm bad at this..., so yeah there is no chance in hell that i get one of his "Karma points" and be able to make my character and play it again.

So i convinced him that seeing that my char is a revenant Hexblade, that i'm healed by my Pact Patron and brought back to life, wich din't please 2 of the other players, because i won't be able to play him in the new campaign anyway, and that i would really like to play it at least to the Paragon tier, he agreed.

So i came back my equipment gone, because my comrades where oblivous to the fact that i wasn't really dead and they looted me( yes this time too), so i traced their way back to them, but because they where attacked by Doppleganger assassins, they where overly cautious of me etc etc, and in the end the gave my items back( bare for my Implement sword who one of them sold to a wandering merchant for potions, and anoter kept my fencing master boots...)

So it allready was a tense situation, because i really had to argue and talk them into it, so doing it a second time, even if this time i'm more legitimate, will be more tricky, seeing that one of the 2 players who din't like the fact that my char was brought back to life, will whine and bitch like a little girl(thats the one guy who makes atrocious amounts of 20's on his rolls), and my friend allready told me that this guy still hasn't swallowed the fact that my Hexblade was ressurected.

But the Dm and me had come to an agreement, i come with a reroll at the exact xp lvl has my toon was, i get 4 starting items instead of 3, and i get one extra item from my wishlist for the next 5 encounters, even if i don't loot anything, so yeah i made a good bargain and it will be the occasion to try a Figther|Sorceror.

But yeah like you said, there is a disrespect issue, but its not only me, its like this with everyone sadly, another player got his dwarf fighter send into a Ice Cyclone by the goliath barbarian for laugh, while the guy was absent, the dm rolled to see what would happen, 1-2 he fell a height of 10 foot and take Xd6 dmg,  3-4 its 20 foot high and XD10 dmgs , 5 he lands perfectly save on his feets and 6 he is send into the Elemental Cold Realm,...gues what he rolled...

So yeah 3 weeks after the guy still doesn't know that his dwarf is freezing his ass in an elementale realm..., but at least he is not dead...

Only you know what’s best for you to do, but imo this seems like one fu#ked up group your playing with.  Are you all trying to play evil guys?


What’s the rational that your party is even staying with one another if they keep backstabbing each other?  I couldn’t imagine role-playing a guy who is fine staying with a group of people who are constantly killing/looting him.


While it’s good your DM is “throwing you a bone” I wouldn’t feel obligation or even content with that, since it is the DMs fault you died.  Once again, if your character dies without you being at the table; something has seriously gone Fuc@ing wrong.


I think you need to sit down with your entire table and just talk; I know it would be a tense situation, but it sounds like there are some deep personal things going outside the game or amongst yourselves which is manifesting in-game by everyone being ass-hol@s to one another.


If you do nothing else; at least tell the table firmly you don’t want your character to be played unless you are present to play him. Period. 

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In my group a player who will be absent must take precautions for his character's preoccupation (business trip, planning, etc.) or safety (rope trick, wards, etc.) in the previous session(s); if he fails to do so and the character is "idle" the DM has license to play him as an NPC.  I find that it works pretty well.
Wow.  Yes, he is.  I had no idea he'd made a thread as well.  I really do want to give him another chance, but I'm not sure how the other players will feel.



In a bit late, but I hope you and the other players give him another chance.  From the tone of your original post, it seemed that your DM was a little bit shell shocked at how fast things got out of control.  In reading his post, it seems clear that it didn't end up the way he intended.  He wants to get better.  He sounds like a DM willing to listen to his players.

There's a big difference in my eyes between a DM who screws the pooch, and admits it and tries to improve and most of the bad DM stories I see here where the DM is overbearing, knows it all, and railroads the crap out of people.

It seems to me, this just got away from him a little bit and everyone paid the price.  Sure, he should have handled things differently, but /he/ knows he should have handled it differently, and that's the key.