[ICD] - Ob

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Ok I posted the OP version in [Contest] - Legends so I wanted to know what others would think of the tweaked version:
The sleepy cousin of Ib Halfheart, Goblin Tactician!



Op Sleepyhead, War Signaler 


 

Legendary creature - Goblin Advisor (M)


Shroud

: Randomly choose a number from 1-4. You may put up to X Goblin creature cards from your hand and put it onto the battlefield where X is the chosen number. They gain haste. Sacrifice them at the beginning of the next end step.


"Whenever I snore... I mean give the signal... one of you will charge into battle and get yourself killed, clear?"


2/2




Feel free to discuss Cheers

EDIT: MAJOR changes and shortening of text.

A typical   trying to get somewhere in the Multiverse, allons-y?

DOCTOR WHO OOOOOOOOEEOOOOOOOO OOOOOOEEOOOOOOO (I'm weird, cant help it)

Famous Quotes:

144543765 wrote:
I was browsing through some cards in gatherer and I noticed something really odd - the transforming cards from Innistrad like Mayor of Avabruck have separate comments and ratings for each side. Isn't that totally stupid? It feels as senseless as having two different pages for each side of a split card or having different pages for Nimble Mongoose with and without threshold.

56965528 wrote:
*mutters under his breath* Squinty's Wife: "What was that!?!?" Umm, I said.... umm..... ahhh.... *another smack upside the head* Squinty's Wife: "Care to try again?" *shakes head vigerously* Squinty's Wife: "That's better." ~SE++ *whimpering*

Current deck goals:

NON-AGGRO, NON-MONO RED deck (Not getting very far with it though)

Standard mono red deck for FNM next Friday

Shroud isn't really a red ability. Otherwise, it's an interesting card. Why snore counters instead of +1/+1 counters? The effect is the same in almost every way. The mechanic is extremely powerful; free Siege-Gang Commanders are damn frosty. There's also a lot of busy work in this card that might not need to be there.
Shroud isn't really a red ability. Otherwise, it's an interesting card. Why snore counters instead of +1/+1 counters? The effect is the same in almost every way. The mechanic is extremely powerful; free Siege-Gang Commanders are damn frosty. There's also a lot of busy work in this card that might not need to be there.




Well shroud cos hes sleeping so no one not even his master can target him or anything.
I didnt want it to be pumped up like cards like give every creature a +1/+1 counter.
Any other comments would be nice!

A typical   trying to get somewhere in the Multiverse, allons-y?

DOCTOR WHO OOOOOOOOEEOOOOOOOO OOOOOOEEOOOOOOO (I'm weird, cant help it)

Famous Quotes:

144543765 wrote:
I was browsing through some cards in gatherer and I noticed something really odd - the transforming cards from Innistrad like Mayor of Avabruck have separate comments and ratings for each side. Isn't that totally stupid? It feels as senseless as having two different pages for each side of a split card or having different pages for Nimble Mongoose with and without threshold.

56965528 wrote:
*mutters under his breath* Squinty's Wife: "What was that!?!?" Umm, I said.... umm..... ahhh.... *another smack upside the head* Squinty's Wife: "Care to try again?" *shakes head vigerously* Squinty's Wife: "That's better." ~SE++ *whimpering*

Current deck goals:

NON-AGGRO, NON-MONO RED deck (Not getting very far with it though)

Standard mono red deck for FNM next Friday

That looks like way too much text for one card.

L1 Judge

I think the shroud is fine, personally. Definitely way more balanced this way. It could be condensed a little, as Wahooney points out, but the overall idea and flavor are very well done. If you want to give it Shroud, though, you should probably make it unconditional. What you sacrifice in flavor, you make up for in elegance.

What about if it let you play goblins from your hand, rather than your library? It tones the power down a little, but that could be a good thing for such a cheap creature.
First, the name needs to be changed.

Second, the ability is busted to hell and back.

Third, I really don't get the flavor. If you have to use flavor text to explain what your card is doing, the flavor isn't strong enough.
That's funny, I don't get the mechanics. I just see a wall of text.
139359831 wrote:
Clever deduction Watson! Maybe you can explain why Supergirl is trying to kill me.
---- Autocard is your friend. Lightning Bolt = Lightning Bolt
Ok MAJOR edits to it now. Is it much better?

A typical   trying to get somewhere in the Multiverse, allons-y?

DOCTOR WHO OOOOOOOOEEOOOOOOOO OOOOOOEEOOOOOOO (I'm weird, cant help it)

Famous Quotes:

144543765 wrote:
I was browsing through some cards in gatherer and I noticed something really odd - the transforming cards from Innistrad like Mayor of Avabruck have separate comments and ratings for each side. Isn't that totally stupid? It feels as senseless as having two different pages for each side of a split card or having different pages for Nimble Mongoose with and without threshold.

56965528 wrote:
*mutters under his breath* Squinty's Wife: "What was that!?!?" Umm, I said.... umm..... ahhh.... *another smack upside the head* Squinty's Wife: "Care to try again?" *shakes head vigerously* Squinty's Wife: "That's better." ~SE++ *whimpering*

Current deck goals:

NON-AGGRO, NON-MONO RED deck (Not getting very far with it though)

Standard mono red deck for FNM next Friday

Shroud? Possibly the most anti-red ability in the game.
139359831 wrote:
Clever deduction Watson! Maybe you can explain why Supergirl is trying to kill me.
---- Autocard is your friend. Lightning Bolt = Lightning Bolt
Shroud? Possibly the most anti-red ability in the game.

No, that would be protection from red.

But yeah, shroud shouldn't be on the card.
"The body is but a vessel for the soul, a puppet which bends to the soul's tyranny. And lo, the body is not eternal, for it must feed on the flesh of others, lest it return to the dust from whence it came. Therefore must the soul deceive, despise and murder men."The Durai Papers

Shroud? Possibly the most anti-red ability in the game.

No, that would be protection from red.

But yeah, shroud shouldn't be on the card.



Why doesnt anyone get it?
The reason i gave shroud to it is cos hes SLEEPING so no one can talk, target or command him to do anything.

A typical   trying to get somewhere in the Multiverse, allons-y?

DOCTOR WHO OOOOOOOOEEOOOOOOOO OOOOOOEEOOOOOOO (I'm weird, cant help it)

Famous Quotes:

144543765 wrote:
I was browsing through some cards in gatherer and I noticed something really odd - the transforming cards from Innistrad like Mayor of Avabruck have separate comments and ratings for each side. Isn't that totally stupid? It feels as senseless as having two different pages for each side of a split card or having different pages for Nimble Mongoose with and without threshold.

56965528 wrote:
*mutters under his breath* Squinty's Wife: "What was that!?!?" Umm, I said.... umm..... ahhh.... *another smack upside the head* Squinty's Wife: "Care to try again?" *shakes head vigerously* Squinty's Wife: "That's better." ~SE++ *whimpering*

Current deck goals:

NON-AGGRO, NON-MONO RED deck (Not getting very far with it though)

Standard mono red deck for FNM next Friday

Shroud? Possibly the most anti-red ability in the game.

No, that would be protection from red.

But yeah, shroud shouldn't be on the card.



Excuse Me? Most anti-red ability in the game eh?

A typical   trying to get somewhere in the Multiverse, allons-y?

DOCTOR WHO OOOOOOOOEEOOOOOOOO OOOOOOEEOOOOOOO (I'm weird, cant help it)

Famous Quotes:

144543765 wrote:
I was browsing through some cards in gatherer and I noticed something really odd - the transforming cards from Innistrad like Mayor of Avabruck have separate comments and ratings for each side. Isn't that totally stupid? It feels as senseless as having two different pages for each side of a split card or having different pages for Nimble Mongoose with and without threshold.

56965528 wrote:
*mutters under his breath* Squinty's Wife: "What was that!?!?" Umm, I said.... umm..... ahhh.... *another smack upside the head* Squinty's Wife: "Care to try again?" *shakes head vigerously* Squinty's Wife: "That's better." ~SE++ *whimpering*

Current deck goals:

NON-AGGRO, NON-MONO RED deck (Not getting very far with it though)

Standard mono red deck for FNM next Friday

So any other comments?

A typical   trying to get somewhere in the Multiverse, allons-y?

DOCTOR WHO OOOOOOOOEEOOOOOOOO OOOOOOEEOOOOOOO (I'm weird, cant help it)

Famous Quotes:

144543765 wrote:
I was browsing through some cards in gatherer and I noticed something really odd - the transforming cards from Innistrad like Mayor of Avabruck have separate comments and ratings for each side. Isn't that totally stupid? It feels as senseless as having two different pages for each side of a split card or having different pages for Nimble Mongoose with and without threshold.

56965528 wrote:
*mutters under his breath* Squinty's Wife: "What was that!?!?" Umm, I said.... umm..... ahhh.... *another smack upside the head* Squinty's Wife: "Care to try again?" *shakes head vigerously* Squinty's Wife: "That's better." ~SE++ *whimpering*

Current deck goals:

NON-AGGRO, NON-MONO RED deck (Not getting very far with it though)

Standard mono red deck for FNM next Friday

Shroud? Possibly the most anti-red ability in the game.

No, that would be protection from red.

But yeah, shroud shouldn't be on the card.



Why doesnt anyone get it?
The reason i gave shroud to it is cos hes SLEEPING so no one can talk, target or command him to do anything.



But red is more about being flashy, doing whatever you feel like and damn the consquences.
139359831 wrote:
Clever deduction Watson! Maybe you can explain why Supergirl is trying to kill me.
---- Autocard is your friend. Lightning Bolt = Lightning Bolt
Shroud? Possibly the most anti-red ability in the game.

No, that would be protection from red.

But yeah, shroud shouldn't be on the card.



Why doesnt anyone get it?
The reason i gave shroud to it is cos hes SLEEPING so no one can talk, target or command him to do anything.



But red is more about being flashy, doing whatever you feel like and damn the consquences.



So what should I replace it then? 
Thanx

A typical   trying to get somewhere in the Multiverse, allons-y?

DOCTOR WHO OOOOOOOOEEOOOOOOOO OOOOOOEEOOOOOOO (I'm weird, cant help it)

Famous Quotes:

144543765 wrote:
I was browsing through some cards in gatherer and I noticed something really odd - the transforming cards from Innistrad like Mayor of Avabruck have separate comments and ratings for each side. Isn't that totally stupid? It feels as senseless as having two different pages for each side of a split card or having different pages for Nimble Mongoose with and without threshold.

56965528 wrote:
*mutters under his breath* Squinty's Wife: "What was that!?!?" Umm, I said.... umm..... ahhh.... *another smack upside the head* Squinty's Wife: "Care to try again?" *shakes head vigerously* Squinty's Wife: "That's better." ~SE++ *whimpering*

Current deck goals:

NON-AGGRO, NON-MONO RED deck (Not getting very far with it though)

Standard mono red deck for FNM next Friday