Questions about Paladin

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So, I want to build a very defensive character and I heard Paladins were great for that. I just started a new campaign with my friends and we just had our first sessions. So our characters are not set yet. Right now we have a Sorceror, Fighter, Ranger, Bard, and myself a Pally.

I have read the handbook and I just really am not sure what to get as I level. What feats should I get as I go, should I be using a shield or should I be using a larger weapon(or different weapon all together). Stat point wise we are on a 25 point buy, overall. I just want some guideance on what I should be grabbing and looking for through heroic? I was thinking of being a tiefling also, but went with Dragonborn, but like I said I can change things around still based off any suggestions I get.

Oh and one more thing, I was wondering if anyone had some strategies for working with another defender.

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====== Created Using Wizards of the Coast D&D Character Builder ======
Balasar, level 1
Dragonborn, Paladin
Dragonborn Racial Power Option: Dragon Breath
Dragon Breath Key Ability: Dragon Breath Strength
Dragon Breath Damage Type: Dragon Breath Lightning
Waterdeep (Waterdeep Benefit)
Theme: Guardian

FINAL ABILITY SCORES
STR 18, CON 14, DEX 10, INT 9, WIS 14, CHA 17

STARTING ABILITY SCORES
STR 16, CON 14, DEX 10, INT 9, WIS 14, CHA 15


AC: 20 Fort: 15 Ref: 13 Will: 14
HP: 29 Surges: 12 Surge Value: 9

TRAINED SKILLS
Diplomacy +10, Endurance +3, Intimidate +10, Religion +4

UNTRAINED SKILLS
Acrobatics –4, Arcana –1, Athletics +0, Bluff +3, Dungeoneering +2, Heal +2, History +1, Insight +2, Nature +2, Perception +2, Stealth –4, Streetwise +3, Thievery –4

POWERS
Basic Attack: Melee Basic Attack
Basic Attack: Ranged Basic Attack
Guardian Attack: Guardian's Counter
Dragonborn Racial Power: Dragon Breath
Paladin Feature: Divine Mettle
Paladin Feature: Divine Strength
Paladin Feature: Divine Challenge
Paladin Feature: Lay on Hands
Paladin Attack 1: Virtuous Strike
Paladin Attack 1: Ardent Strike
Paladin Attack 1: Divine Pursuit
Paladin Attack 1: Blood of the Mighty

FEATS
Level 1: Mighty Challenge

ITEMS
Longsword x1
Plate Armor x1
Adventurer's Kit
Heavy Shield x1
====== End ======


Ok, eventhough you are the perfect race for a Baladin (Balanced Paladin) I don't recommend them. If you do want to play balanced go with 18 in both Str and Cha.

If you keep your stat array as it is, dump Virtuous Strike. It is a cha attack so you are -1 to hit with it. I would take Holy Strike or Valiant Strike probably.

Also be wary of sanction, mighty challenge only increases your challenge damage, not your sanction damage.

Other than that I would probably focus on either being Str based (which it looks like you want) or Cha based (which I think is the best)

Also look at the Art of Defending posts. Gives great advice for 2 defenders.
What sort of setup is your group Fighter?

Edit:  Noticing you said you wanted a very defensive character.  While a Straladin and a Baladin can both be quite good, a good Chaladin is going to top them both defensively.  A variety of multi-mark sanctions, nice defensive buffs, and the option to really go nuts with group healing. 
No, I am not set on going STR, I can see from yall's post that I need to change to Charisma. I had a notion in my head that to be more defense I needed to be STR, which sounds very silly while typing it out and yalls posts.

How should I rearrange my stats for a Charisma build, and would I keep virtuous strike then?

And I guess I would be changing my feat, what should I pick up and look for the next couple of levels.

EDIT: Also, our fighter builds himself to be more of an off striker. 
This is what he looks like now. I was stuck on deciding feats, Draconic Challenge, Devout Protector, and Battlewise. I went with the devout protector.

[spoiler]

====== Created Using Wizards of the Coast D&D Character Builder ======
Balasar, level 1
Dragonborn, Paladin
Dragonborn Racial Power Option: Dragon Breath
Dragon Breath Key Ability: Dragon Breath Constitution
Dragon Breath Damage Type: Dragon Breath Lightning
Waterdeep (Waterdeep Benefit)
Theme: Guardian

FINAL ABILITY SCORES
STR 14, CON 15, DEX 10, INT 8, WIS 15, CHA 19

STARTING ABILITY SCORES
STR 14, CON 13, DEX 10, INT 8, WIS 15, CHA 17


AC: 20 Fort: 13 Ref: 13 Will: 15
HP: 30 Surges: 12 Surge Value: 9

TRAINED SKILLS
Diplomacy +11, Endurance +3, Intimidate +11, Religion +4

UNTRAINED SKILLS
Acrobatics –4, Arcana –1, Athletics –2, Bluff +4, Dungeoneering +2, Heal +2, History +1, Insight +2, Nature +2, Perception +2, Stealth –4, Streetwise +4, Thievery –4

POWERS
Basic Attack: Melee Basic Attack
Basic Attack: Ranged Basic Attack
Guardian Attack: Guardian's Counter
Dragonborn Racial Power: Dragon Breath
Paladin Feature: Divine Mettle
Paladin Feature: Divine Strength
Paladin Feature: Divine Challenge
Paladin Feature: Lay on Hands
Paladin Attack 1: Virtuous Strike
Paladin Attack 1: Ardent Strike
Paladin Attack 1: Valorous Smite
Paladin Attack 1: Majestic Halo

FEATS
Level 1: Devout Protector Expertise

ITEMS
Longsword x1
Plate Armor x1
Adventurer's Kit
Heavy Shield x1
====== End ======


/spoiler]
Your stats are a little odd, I'd say.  Unless you're planning on qualifying for some feats I'm not thinking of, which for the most part isn't a huge deal with a Chaladin.  I'd go 12,12,10,8,16,16 preracial, go +Con for Dragonborn, and bump Wis/Dex for levelups.  Hell, I'd start with a 10 in Str if I could, but then you start running into encumberance issues.

Edit:  At this point I think it's important to consider where you want to go with the build.  You have a few options, but I've only had any experience with embracing your crazy heals and going Hospitaler.  To be fair, that's a damn fine option for you.  Keep an eye on healing powers, and considering your crazy high Dragonborn surge value, Lend Health is just so much more sexy. 
Look up the Inexhaustible Dragon Sovereign and take some tips from there.