Building a Bladesinger.

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I keep hearing that I won't be having a great time as a bladesinger. But I've decided to give it a try any way.
I've already checked the guide on this forum, but it's not really what I'm after. He's an eladrin. My goal is to build it with a secondary role as defender.
We will be starting on level 11. Inherent bonuses, so no magic gear, and no backgrounds. 

The group consists of a slayer, a dragon sorcerer and an ... anti-optimizied cleric.

I'm looking for some solid ideas and suggestions. First, I'm looking at different stat arrays. It's kind of annoying that it needs both dex and int. I could just go 18 int/16 dex (pre racial). But something tells me that I shouldn't. I'm playing around with the idea of a 16/16 build, to be able to get the NAD feats.

Any other synergies I should be considering? I think I might pick up Blade Initiate for Eladrin Swordmage Advance too. I do expect the character to be able to produce something akin to a nova move with the bladesong though. For paragon path, I'm currently looking at blood mage. The abilities do have some strong control, plus the encounter retrieval. I'm still up for suggestions though.

I'm playing around with a build now, will post it later. Mean while, please give me input.  
Check my sig for a list of interesting builds.
ESA should probably be mandatory for you - it's definitely the best reason to be Eladrin at all.

I'm glad sven posted so I don't have to look up his thread to recommend it.  Those build ideas really renewed my interest in the class.  Straightforward INT/DEX builds are generally seen as a trap, but there are a lot of ways around that setup.  For an eladrin, I'd probably go with a generator build - dumping DEX entirely, taking Lightning Soul at 11, and then adding Admixture Fire and Fiery Blood when you hit 12.

As for secondary defendering, your front line looks pretty tough.  As long as you're fairly tough yourself, you should be fine without a defender.
It's difficult to take a class that's supposedly a controller, but plays better as a marginal striker, and try to make a defender out of it.

Can you be a half-elf instead of eladrin (call it half-eladrin)? With Defending Dabbler and a remotely interesting basic attack dilettante of some sort (like eldritch strike), you could at least pretend to be a defender with a mark. Then you knock another adjacent enemy prone, and there's a decent chance they'll both attack you. How you'll survive their attacks? I'm not sure. Toughness/Improved Defenses only goes so far. Maybe White Lotus Defense, and a few utilities like Shield. It's hard to find THP generation, resistances, saving throws, without items. Maybe a skill power here and there could help.
I'd go old school with a Hybrid Swordmage/Wizard and call it a Bladesinger, to be honest. With that party it's not that the Bladesinger will be underpowered, but you really don't have any tools to defend.
Best way to make a defender (and the only Int/Dex build I'd consider remotely viable) out of a Bladesinger is a Human War Wizard of Cormyr.  Don't worry about pumping your Dex too much (in fact, go for the 20 starting Int), because damage is not really what you're after.  It's all about the special effects.  You defend by having the target prone at your feet with a -4 penalty to attacks (Psychic Lock + the radiant bladespell).