New totally hot Race that will be so EPIC

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I have added a new Race to Aria while I was updating the book and checking P!nk's facebook feed ("I want to gallop into a wooded glen and punch-dance my rage away") and Brett the Enchanter and all Zell-natives are now of this new race.


 


Uniborn


The Uniborn are fey warriors of the hidden glens and unknown meadows of the Feywild.  They resemble humanoin unicorns, they are smooth skinned and slightly fuzzy with a mane of vivid colors ranging from purest white to a spectrum of rainbow hues.  A Uniborn usually stands between 6 and 7 feet tall and are white or shades of grey in color.  Uniborn are of impressive stature and usually weigh between 190 and 260 pounds.  A uniborns horn is a proud display of it's virtue and power, but the proud uniborn never use this as a weapon, prefering instead to wield longswords.


 


Playing as a Uniborn


To uniborn, life is about collecting experiences and traveling as widely as possible.  Adversaries should be treated as nothing more than hurdles to overcome on the way to- wherever the uniborn is going next


A drive to discover leads uniborn to gather many friends and allies as it wanders the world, and while some friends may be never seen again or long between visits, a uniborn is always a loyal, if not always present companion.


Uniborn are concerned with what tales they will leave behind when they are laid to rest, and are drawn to adventuring in hopes of becoming renowned legends in uniborn tales.


 


Racial Traits


Average Height: 6-7 feet


Average Weight: 190-280 pounds


 


Ability Scores: Strength or Constitution +2, Charisma +2


Size: Medium


Speed: 7 squares


Vision: Low-Light


 


Languages: Common, Elven


Skill Bonuses: +2 Endurance, +2 History


Uniborn Dash: When you charge, you do not provoke opportunity attacks.


Fey Heritage: You are considered a fey creature for all effects that relate to creature origin.


Duelist: You have proficiency in the longsword.


Blessed Horn: You may use the Blessed Horn encounter power.


 


 


Blessed Horn                                                                               Uniborn Racial Encounter Power


As you lean down to touch your ally with your magical horn, your strength flows into them, renewing them.


Encounter • Healing, Radiant


Minor Action         Melee 1


Target: One bloodied ally


The ally is able to use it's second wind, however uses your healing surge value + charisma modifier when recovering hit points.


 


Play a Uniborn if you want…



  • To be noble and adventurous



  • To be from an exotic race of totally attractive horse-dudes



  • To heal your allies with the touch of your magical horn



  • To be a member of a race that favors the Warlord, Fighter, Paladin, and Bard classes


First of all: Blow.

Now that that's out of the way...

Uniborn Dash: When you charge, you do not provoke opportunity attacks.

Two problems with this feature:
A) This is very probably too powerful for a racial feature. Comparing to, say, the Minotaur's Heedless Charge feature, this is objectively better by quite a large margin. This feature needs to be less powerful.
B) Just like the Minotaur's Heedless Charge feature, this feature of yours pigeon-holes the race far too much to be considered an acceptable racial feature. Think about this: charging requires that you spend a standard action to rush into melee to make a melee basic attack. In other words, this feature, while amazing for a character that selected a STR-primary, Weapon-using, melee classes, would be totally useless for a chracter that didn't select a STR-primary, Weapon-using, melee class, and that is the definition of racial pigeon-holing. This feature needs to be more broadly useful.

Blessed Horn                                                                               Uniborn Racial Encounter Power
As you lean down to touch your ally with your magical horn, your strength flows into them, renewing them.
Encounter • Healing, Radiant
Minor Action         Melee 1
Target: One bloodied ally
The ally is able to use it's second wind, however uses your healing surge value + charisma modifier when recovering hit points.

Two problems:
A) Why does this have the Radiant keyword? Radiant is a damage keyword, and this power deals no radiant damage.
B) It is my opinion that forcing the power to rely on Charisma is problematic, again because of racial pigeon-holing. This doesn't pigeon-hole the race as badly as the other feature does, but it is still quite unfortunate that a Fighter of this race will not have as potent a racial power as a Sorcerer of this race, especially when this isn't true of other, better designed racial powers like Elven Accuracy, Memory of a Thousand Lifetimes, Shard Swarm, etc.

Why, yes, as a matter of fact I am the Unfailing Arbiter of All That Is Good Design (Even More So Than The Actual Developers) TM Speaking of things that were badly designed, please check out this thread for my Minotaur fix. What have the critics said, you ask? "If any of my players ask to play a Minotaur, I'm definitely offering this as an alternative to the official version." - EmpactWB "If I ever feel like playing a Minotaur I'll know where to look!" - Undrave "WoTC if you are reading this - please take this guy's advice." - Ferol_Debtor_of_Torm "Really full of win. A minotaur that is actually attractive for more than just melee classes." - Cpt_Micha Also, check out my recent GENASI variant! If you've ever wished that your Fire Genasi could actually set stuff on fire, your Water Genasi could actually swim, or your Wind Genasi could at least glide, then look no further. Finally, check out my OPTIONS FOR EVERYONE article, an effort to give unique support to the races that WotC keeps forgetting about. Includes new racial feature options for the Changeling, Deva, Githzerai, Gnoll, Gnome, Goliath, Half-Orc, Kalashtar, Minotaur, Shadar-Kai, Thri-Kreen, Warforged and more!
My initial reaction was almost a groan, followed by a hmm. As CC mentioned, having racial features that only impact a portion of potential classes for a race is a bad idea. Same goes for an evidently arbitrary weapon proficiency (not sure where longsword prof fits in with unicorns). Both are best left as potential racial feats.

For a racial power, I'd consider giving a choice of racial powers: a "lay on hands"-like power (but I agree with CC the bonus should probably give a choice of stat to use), or a "fey step"-like power (unicorns were able to teleport in older edtions, not sure if they can in 4e).

For alternate racial features, I'd give them a bonus to saves vs charm and fear effects (being "noble" and all). I'm tempted to suggest having resistance to something, although necrotic or psychic seem potentially appropriate (but not both).

It's an interesting concept.

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Well, while I don't generally agree with CC that a race can't favor either melee or ranged a little more, I do have to say that the Unicorn Dash is definitely powerful.  And this is coming from experience playing with a character that used charged, DMing with players who used charging, and one of my friends in our group playing a character who pretty much focuses on charging.  Definitely powerful.
Instead, I'd say have them ignore difficult terrain in natural settings, like the elves.  Kinda fits the whole nature unicorn thing I'd think.

I honestly like the racial feature.  I do gotta kinda agree with the others though, making it only Cha based could suck.  I would suggest having it be Con or Cha mod.  That way it gives more variety, and yeah, remove the radiant keyword.
Longsword proficiency, eh you could keep it if you can't come up with anything else, otherwise like Mithrus said it could make a good racial feat, that way you could say, give longsword proficiency and a little something extra with the feat.    
Furthermore the healing needs to be looked at closely, I mean what if the other party members have higher surge values than you?

Example Uniborn Sorcerer vs. Dragonborn Warden.

Odds are the d-born's surge value could rival your bloodied hp.

Consider this: The target may spend a healing surge to regain it's surge value + X hp.

Where X is whichever ability mod(s) you decide on, or better yet X is a flat bonus that scales with tier, and a racial feat lets you add an ability score mod on top of that.

@Alitain: Elves do not ignore difficult terrain in "natural settings" they ignore difficult terrain while shifting.
Furthermore the healing needs to be looked at closely, I mean what if the other party members have higher surge values than you?

Example Uniborn Sorcerer vs. Dragonborn Warden.

Odds are the d-born's surge value could rival your bloodied hp.

Consider this: The target may spend a healing surge to regain it's surge value + X hp.

Where X is whichever ability mod(s) you decide on, or better yet X is a flat bonus that scales with tier, and a racial feat lets you add an ability score mod on top of that.

@Alitain: Elves do not ignore difficult terrain in "natural settings" they ignore difficult terrain while shifting.



Whoops, knew it was something about ignore difficult terrain, thanks for the correction though.

Though I will say, I honestly like the healing as coming from the Uniborn.  Even if the character he's using it on has a higher surge value, what if they have no powers to use it?  Then it really doesn't matter if their surge value is 50 while the uniborn's is 38.  Same with potions, you spend a HS, but instead of gaining maybe you're much better surge value, you get a set amount depending on the potion because it's a way to heal when you can't otherwise.  Makes sense honestly.  That and it reminds me of the main character from a book series, Acorna.  Healed by touching the wound with her horn. 
Yes, read a few of those myself.

However, my main concern is that the power is not adequately explained.
What if the ally used Second wind already?
Also do they get to use the ability as a special action during your turn like a a granted action from a warlord? or do they have the option to second wind with the different healing value during their next turn?

Seemed simpler to use healing surge+. 
Yes, read a few of those myself.

However, my main concern is that the power is not adequately explained.
What if the ally used Second wind already?
Also do they get to use the ability as a special action during your turn like a a granted action from a warlord? or do they have the option to second wind with the different healing value during their next turn?

Seemed simpler to use healing surge+. 


Good point, didn't think about.  I'm going to assume the OP means they're granted the ability to use their second wind with a bonus, but yeah since it doesn't exactly state it, it could cause issues.  If no one knows whether they get to spend their second wind immediately upon use of the power, or on their turn, and with what action, it'll cause a debate.  I agree, on that note either the wording needs to be cleared up with say,
"Effect: The target can spend their second wind as a free action if they have it available, but instead of using their healing surge value, they use your healing surge value + Cha/Con mod bonus HP."
Something like that maybe?  Guess it still leaves the question of when up in the air a bit, but well...eh.
Though you have a point Rampant, may just be better to have the power simply be that the uniborn spends a healing surge, and the target gains HP equivalent to your HS value + Cha(and I think Con) mod. 
yes they have to have a second wind remaining.  I know that Dash is controversially powerful, and so I felt that Horn needed to be highly conditional.  I grappled with longsword proficiency for some time, but since I Wanted to create a race of chivalrous creatures, (Dragonborn's bushido base is thematically inappropriate for Aria) I felt that they needed to be swordsmen.

In defense of Dash, I have a Uniborn cavalier in the party right now who'se made use of the power, but found that after having dashed it is better to remain in melee to get Aura.  I don't know that I'll see it in a slayer or base melee warrior at this time but I'm curious as to how the power might be exploited.  The normal rules for charges still apply (hard corners, minimum range, ends turn) but yes, the Uniborn as a race are knights in shining armor who charge fearlessly into battle, as called for by their knightly virtues.

I'm also keen on seeing a hexblade or fey base warlock 
yes they have to have a second wind remaining.  I know that Dash is controversially powerful, and so I felt that Horn needed to be highly conditional.  I grappled with longsword proficiency for some time, but since I Wanted to create a race of chivalrous creatures, (Dragonborn's bushido base is thematically inappropriate for Aria) I felt that they needed to be swordsmen.

In defense of Dash, I have a Uniborn cavalier in the party right now who'se made use of the power, but found that after having dashed it is better to remain in melee to get Aura.  I don't know that I'll see it in a slayer or base melee warrior at this time but I'm curious as to how the power might be exploited.  The normal rules for charges still apply (hard corners, minimum range, ends turn) but yes, the Uniborn as a race are knights in shining armor who charge fearlessly into battle, as called for by their knightly virtues.

I'm also keen on seeing a hexblade or fey base warlock 



Well, and their may be more elaborate or specific example, but the way Dash will be exploited is by doing exactly what it does.  Charging without provoking OAs.  Regardless of keeping the charging rules the same, that means a Uniborn can charge around the battlefield right past enemies without fear of retaliation.  Makes him a lot more maneuverable.  Sure, your Cavalier right now might be better off sticking in one place to fight but you gotta understand, when people here look at homebrewed races they don't look at the race as something specifically made for one class, one character kinda deal.  They look at it as a race that could be used by anyone in any D&D game, with any class.  Hence you have people like CC who feel that a race needs to be balanced for both melee and ranged classes.

Your Uniborn right now might not exploit charging without recourse, but someone who picks it up for the Slayer, or Barbarian, or Feral Druid, etc WILL.  I'm sure it wouldn't be too hard to make an incredible charging PC out of just having the Dash ability.  That's a lot of why we're saying Dash is overpowered, because it really is.  You might not feel it's OP with your character right now but that's because you're not playing a character that uses charging.  Now if your Uniborn race is really only meant for being a dashing knight in shining armor, then fine.  There's nothing wrong with wanting a race just to fit a certain, particular character.  But us on the forums just don't usually look at them like that, so ya know. 
Earlier replay was at work, have more time to write now

To be sure, I'm looking forward to seeing the game breaking elements in play to see where I need to do adjustments.  The way that I'm looking forward to seeing it implemented is precisely in the way that you all describe.  I have a player who is interested in having the sort of high mobility that comes with the monks Crane stance, however since I want a eurocentric atmosphere this class is also inappropriate to the world at hand.  The uniborn allows that player a different dimension of the sort of mobility that flying over enemies wire-fu style allowed him with his monk in our friends game, without corrupting my knighthoods with crouching tigers.

While this does amount to a nice bonus to hit and being able to cross a battlefield, it is still somewhat limited in it's scope insofar as it requires that the other conditions for a charge be at hand.  In deference to the arguments that have been made however (not to suggest that I hadn't considered these things or anticipated the "charge is OP argument"), it may be a good change to add an additional condition to this power, changing it to Triumphant Charge as an at will free action that lasts until the end of the next turn after having defeated an enemy (they flee before by you or are downed).
As the cavalier progresses and as I see what a uniborn slayer or others of the classes mentioned do with the power, I will make appropriate adjustments as needed as I work towards the final iteration of the race.

I look at the matter of racial pigeon-holing as a non-issue as I began playing in the second edition where it was a simple fact of the rule books.  It's true that the race *heavily* favors melee warriors where Charge is concerned, and this is by design.  A similar argument could be made for the dwarf ability to ignore heavy armor encumberment in that the power is worthless to a cloth wearing wizard, in this case as well it is simply by design that the dwarf favors the heavily armored classes.  I am a long-time wizard player, and I did spend time carefully thinking about what paragon paths a Uniborn of different classes might take in the non-warrior classes (Wizard of the Spiral Tower). A Uniborn may not make an amazing example of every class-path combination, but this is true of almost all non-human races.

In the matter of the radiant keyword where Horn is concerned, this is another world-specific feature of play that can be ignored outside of Aria.  Aria has a number of themes that I play up hard, specifically the notion of good against evil being the clash between the angelic and demonic archetypes rather than between grizzled fighters of moral ambuguity (AGAIN.  Yes, I get it, you're YET ANOTHER gritty antihero). Ongoing necrotic damage is a signature move of Arian black magic, applying healing effects that have the radiant keyword (generally this means healing that comes from Elven Grace powers or Divine source powers) grants a saving throw versus such damage in Aria.  This reflects my attitude that the healing one recieves from a divine healer or blessed knightly man-unicorn is better equipped to deal with black magic than the healing one recieves in pep-talks from someone like a warlord.

The suggestion to consider giving it the option of being based on other modifiers is a good one that I will incorporate in the next iteration.

In the matter of relative surge values where other members are concerned there does need to be some clarification.  The Bloodied condition shall be amended to read "bloodied or uncontious."  The primary intent of Blessed Horn was to give the Uniborn a once-per encounter instant heal check equivalent power with the added bonus of being usable on an ally who is still standing.  Regardless of if the amount restored is less than the surge value of the character being revived, there is no chance of rolling a one, being untrained, etc. in order to trigger the second wind of the downed party member, the magic of the horn just makes it happen, and the effects of the second wind start at that time just like any heal check.  So again, the power has some potential benefit, but since Charge as written is so powerful it's highly conditional.  If I decide to add the defeated enemy condition to charge however, horn will likely change to read "surge+cha or your surge+cha whichever is higher."

I appreciate the feedback on these issues, keep it coming.

Well, just like to point out that there's nothing wrong with someone playing the Monk.  The Monk is an asian class, it's a psionic fighter.  A martial artist.  And hate to point out the obvious, but martial arts and just general fighting, is everywhere.  And that's really all the monk is, a more fleet footed psionic fighter, who uses his mental training to enhance his body.  Not to be mean, but you got a real narrow mind it seems on this.  Sorry, just seems that way may be wrong, but curious if you're banning all psionic classes as well because if you ban the monk then all psionic classes would then be "inappropriate" to your world.  But I digress, it's your world and I'm not telling you how to do it, and this also is an entirely different deal than your topic about your race.

I would vote against changing the Dash to an at will power.  Then you're just giving the race a second, at will, racial power.  And then I think that basically leaves you with long sword proficiency as the only real racial feature.  So I would strongly suggest not doing that, this race doesn't need another racial power, so at the very least just leave Dash the way it is until it gets abused and you make changes.

And yeah, the horn healing racial power does need to be worded better, but that happens.  Though I would like to also point out, you keep mentioning how you feel Dash is okay because Charging is conditional.  It's not really "conditional".  Yes you can't always charge your intended target, but neither can you attack your intended target which would make attack in generally conditional.  What I mean is that charging is a choice a player can make to make a type of attack, it's just basically an attack that incorporates a movement.  So saying Dash is okay because charging is conditional personally I just don't see flying.  Mind you, you wanted Dash because you felt it fit the race, fine.  But I would use a better argument for it than you believe it's balanced because you feel charging is "conditional".   

I look at the matter of racial pigeon-holing as a non-issue as I began playing in the second edition where it was a simple fact of the rule books.

Sorry, but I don't buy this. This is not 2nd edition. This is 4th edition. Races in 4th edition are balanced differently and in different ways than races in 2nd edition were. Designing a 4th edition race based on 2nd edition principles is not going to get you a well designed 4th edition race, and it's going to get called out as such when you put it up for examination and critique.

A similar argument could be made for the dwarf ability to ignore heavy armor encumberment in that the power is worthless to a cloth wearing wizard, in this case as well it is simply by design that the dwarf favors the heavily armored classes.

This is not an acceptable excuse. You don't get away with making a mistake just because the developers have also made that mistake or a similar one. Developer mistakes exist to be learned from, not to be repeated.

A Uniborn may not make an amazing example of every class-path combination, but this is true of almost all non-human races.

No, not in the way that it is here. The majority of official races are well designed enough that their powers and features are completely class-independent. In other words, they provide benefits regardless of whether the character being played is melee or ranged, weapon or implement, heavily armored or lightly armored, or whatever else. The classes where they then excel at in comparison are mostly based on ability score bonuses, racial feats, or some other special synergy.  The cases for which that isn't true are few in comparison.

EDIT: I'm looking back at this post that I wrote last night, and I'm thinking that it's a little harsh, so I apologize. The point that I was trying to get across is that the reason for putting up homebrewed creations for examination and critique is to get new perspectives on your creations, perspectives from outside of your considerations and perspectives that may be more objective because of that. Going into it with the mindset that criticisms that aren't specific concerns of yours are therefore not valid criticisms is thus unproductive. Basically, I'm suggesting that you not be so dismissive of critiques that you don't immediately understand or agree with.

Why, yes, as a matter of fact I am the Unfailing Arbiter of All That Is Good Design (Even More So Than The Actual Developers) TM Speaking of things that were badly designed, please check out this thread for my Minotaur fix. What have the critics said, you ask? "If any of my players ask to play a Minotaur, I'm definitely offering this as an alternative to the official version." - EmpactWB "If I ever feel like playing a Minotaur I'll know where to look!" - Undrave "WoTC if you are reading this - please take this guy's advice." - Ferol_Debtor_of_Torm "Really full of win. A minotaur that is actually attractive for more than just melee classes." - Cpt_Micha Also, check out my recent GENASI variant! If you've ever wished that your Fire Genasi could actually set stuff on fire, your Water Genasi could actually swim, or your Wind Genasi could at least glide, then look no further. Finally, check out my OPTIONS FOR EVERYONE article, an effort to give unique support to the races that WotC keeps forgetting about. Includes new racial feature options for the Changeling, Deva, Githzerai, Gnoll, Gnome, Goliath, Half-Orc, Kalashtar, Minotaur, Shadar-Kai, Thri-Kreen, Warforged and more!
I still stand by the dwarf as an example of a race that was crafted with a specific focus in mind, as was this one.

On the matter of harshness, yes, I'd say so.  In respect for your flag and your apology, I'll avoid the snipe that woud have come here.

However, I rather understand the critique entirely and don't at all appreciate the condescending tone of the writing.  It's a hail back to the third edition model in which each and every niche that was possible HAD to be filled as reflected in the Great Wheel cosmology.  If you ever wanted to discuss designer mistakes here is the biggest one the game has ever seen IMO.   The idea that every race should simply be another bland, equally valid flavor in any class combination is creatively bankrupt and produces the sort of flavorless McWorld in which the Lawful Evil Race is arbitrarily at war with the Chaotic Evil Race a la Devils and Demons.  It is what invariably happens when a rule system overrides a narrative process, and why the 4E cosmology so excites me.

The case of the dwarf is not an excuse but an entirely valid argument that you fail to address.  The thematic feel of the dwarven race lends itself to the heavily armored classes, and the ability to ignore the speed penalty reflects this.  The alternative is a character with a 4 speed and this would lead to no one choosing to play a dwarf.  The idea that this rises, a world in which dwarves avoid heavy armor because they can't move around in it, goes against every tradition for the race that attracts players to it to begin with.  We want to play Gimlis, and we can't do that if the dwarf is a weak example of armored classes.  As a consequence, the race has the ability to wear the heavy armor without the speed penalty.  This is not a case of raw design in a combat-vacuum in which there is no roleplaly and therefor a mistake on the part of the game designers, but rather a case where the story and feel of a race trumps the need to be true to the rules in all cases.  Literally, they break the rules because it makes no sense for them to do otherwise.

In the case of the minotaur and by extention the uniborn as well (as I have come to suspect that this critique is primarly aimed at maintaining the primacy of the argumentation that supports the minotaur rewrite that you have produced, which I'm sure is a perfectly valid approach)  the story centric question of who in their right mind is going to stop a minotaur or magical unicorn man charging them is one that begs attention.  Is it, in the context of a combat-vacuum in which rules must reign supreme "broken?"  Sure.  Why would anyone charge with any other races?  In the actual context of game, in which combat is a component of and not the entire session, it plays out rather differently.

As an update, my Uniborn paladin player has used the ability in much the way that I envisioned it: dashing through a group of cultists to directly attack the leader who in his opinion was leading them down the path to damnation.  From a combat perspective, I am seriously considering the adjustment to require a defeated/bloodied enemy as discussed previously, as the dash here did in the combat-vacuum have the effect of "shutting down the controller."  Later, he once again employed it to ensure that the cultist did not escape.  In that context, the context of a narrative story around which good games grow, the power works perfectly in that it had the effect of "apprehending the villain."  I believe that this favoring of the narrative over the rules in a combat-vacuum defines the primary difference in our design paradigms.

Additionally, while some of my other players have been interested in the combat capability of the Uniborn, the straight ones as anticipated have found too much of an investment in their characters heterosexuality to pursue the race.  Once again, the story and narrative functions of the game rule over the mechanical dominance that the combat-vacuum in which you analyze the race would invariably put it into.

I continue to evaluate the race in play, I've yet to see Blessed Horn make an appearance but the Warlord will be out this week so perhaps we'll see this power in performance at the table.
It's a hail back to the third edition model in which each and every niche that was possible HAD to be filled as reflected in the Great Wheel cosmology.  If you ever wanted to discuss designer mistakes here is the biggest one the game has ever seen IMO.   The idea that every race should simply be another bland, equally valid flavor in any class combination is creatively bankrupt and produces the sort of flavorless McWorld in which the Lawful Evil Race is arbitrarily at war with the Chaotic Evil Race a la Devils and Demons.  It is what invariably happens when a rule system overrides a narrative process, and why the 4E cosmology so excites me.

I'm not sure what you're talking about. My critique here has nothing to do with 3E. In fact, if this were a 3E race, then I wouldn't be saying anything at all about the racial charge mechanic because racial pigeon-holing was a normal part of the 3E racial design convention. You're making a big mistake by assuming that races being more equally valid for all classes has to come at the expense of flavor and originality. That's simply not true. I would say that the Deva, Githzerai, and Warforged, for example, are very flavorful races.

The case of the dwarf is not an excuse but an entirely valid argument that you fail to address.  The thematic feel of the dwarven race lends itself to the heavily armored classes, and the ability to ignore the speed penalty reflects this.  The alternative is a character with a 4 speed and this would lead to no one choosing to play a dwarf.  The idea that this rises, a world in which dwarves avoid heavy armor because they can't move around in it, goes against every tradition for the race that attracts players to it to begin with.  We want to play Gimlis, and we can't do that if the dwarf is a weak example of armored classes.  As a consequence, the race has the ability to wear the heavy armor without the speed penalty.  This is not a case of raw design in a combat-vacuum in which there is no roleplaly and therefor a mistake on the part of the game designers, but rather a case where the story and feel of a race trumps the need to be true to the rules in all cases.  Literally, they break the rules because it makes no sense for them to do otherwise.

It's not what they did with the Dwarf but how they did it. They did it in such a way that provided great benefit to some character types while providing zero benefit to other character types, but the key here is that it did not need to have been done that way. They could have crafted the race such that it provided the desired benefit for heavily armored characters while still also leaving room for lightly armored characters to thrive without simply being short an entire racial feature. Here's an example of a racial feature that I might add to the Dwarf to fix this problem:

Steadfast: While you are slowed while wearing light armor or no armor, your speed becomes 3. You can't increase your speed above 3, and your speed doesn't increase if it was lower than 3. If you're slowed while moving, stop moving if you have already moved 3 or more squares.

In this way, the heavily armored Dwarf does get to keep its benefits but the lightly armored Dwarf also gets thrown a bone, and all remains both mechanically and thematically appropriate. Flavor and mechanics are preserved all around. What I suggest that you do if you really feel like you need to have a charge racial feature is to grant your race an alternative racial feature option that it can select in place of that feature should a player decide to play a non-charging character.

In the case of the minotaur and by extention the uniborn as well (as I have come to suspect that this critique is primarly aimed at maintaining the primacy of the argumentation that supports the minotaur rewrite that you have produced, which I'm sure is a perfectly valid approach)  the story centric question of who in their right mind is going to stop a minotaur or magical unicorn man charging them is one that begs attention.  Is it, in the context of a combat-vacuum in which rules must reign supreme "broken?"  Sure.  Why would anyone charge with any other races?  In the actual context of game, in which combat is a component of and not the entire session, it plays out rather differently.

I believe that this favoring of the narrative over the rules in a combat-vacuum defines the primary difference in our design paradigms.

But you don't have to give up mechanics in order to keep flavor intact. Crunch and fluff are not opposite ends of a spectrum. People sometimes perceive my stance to be that mechanics is more important than flavor, but that's not true. What my stance is that mechanics and flavor don't have to be mutually exclusive. If your concept is such that it's impossible not to give up either for the other, then that's a problem, but in the vast majority of cases, this is not true. Your race here can be more mechanically flexible without needing to give up any flavor at all, so why not do that?

Why, yes, as a matter of fact I am the Unfailing Arbiter of All That Is Good Design (Even More So Than The Actual Developers) TM Speaking of things that were badly designed, please check out this thread for my Minotaur fix. What have the critics said, you ask? "If any of my players ask to play a Minotaur, I'm definitely offering this as an alternative to the official version." - EmpactWB "If I ever feel like playing a Minotaur I'll know where to look!" - Undrave "WoTC if you are reading this - please take this guy's advice." - Ferol_Debtor_of_Torm "Really full of win. A minotaur that is actually attractive for more than just melee classes." - Cpt_Micha Also, check out my recent GENASI variant! If you've ever wished that your Fire Genasi could actually set stuff on fire, your Water Genasi could actually swim, or your Wind Genasi could at least glide, then look no further. Finally, check out my OPTIONS FOR EVERYONE article, an effort to give unique support to the races that WotC keeps forgetting about. Includes new racial feature options for the Changeling, Deva, Githzerai, Gnoll, Gnome, Goliath, Half-Orc, Kalashtar, Minotaur, Shadar-Kai, Thri-Kreen, Warforged and more!
Ok Listen, dash is OP simply by magnitude. If you accept the argument that a charging ability is balanced ( i disagree but that's not the issue ) then the ability to charge without provoking OAs is loads better than the similar ability of the PHB3 minotaur which only gets a +2 to avoid OAs when charging, and the phb3 mino is about as charge oriented as a race can get.

With both lowlight vision and speed 7, you've gotta be careful about handing out awesome features.

Radiant is a damage type, powers that don't do damage shouldn't have a damage type. I mean, that's like giving the eladrin power fey step the fire keyword. Now if you want you could make a special function of the power be to damage undead or something and in that case the damage would be radiant.

I'd like to offer more input on the healing power but I'm not sure if the version on the first page is still the one you're using. Is it? Could you update it if it is not?
this race would be epic in Gamma World.
>> Uniborn Dash: When you charge, you do not provoke opportunity attacks.
>
> Two problems with this feature:

I'm not so sure that this is as powerful as it once might have seemed. It's stronger than the minotaur's racial, but the minotaur's racial is pathetic even compared to other vs-OA racials, and nowadays there are several other ways to prevent charges from provoking OAs - Badge of the Berserker, Aspect of the Charging Ram, and so on - which characters with a focus on charging will pick up anyway. (The appearance of these things hasn't exactly helped the standing of Heedless Charge, either!)

Likewise, charging is now a viable option for a much larger number of classes: many of them have gained access to "can be used as a melee basic attack" powers of some sort since the PHB1, and the newest classes often have a built in stat swap for their basic attacks. No, it doesn't cover every class, but charging isn't limited to Str/weapon/melee characters anymore.

-----

OTOH, that points to a different problem: if I'm after a charge-based character then I'm probably better off getting a Badge of the Berserker and playing as some other race that grants a more useful set of abilities.
>> Uniborn Dash: When you charge, you do not provoke opportunity attacks. > > Two problems with this feature: I'm not so sure that this is as powerful as it once might have seemed. It's stronger than the minotaur's racial, but the minotaur's racial is pathetic even compared to other vs-OA racials, and nowadays there are several other ways to prevent charges from provoking OAs - Badge of the Berserker, Aspect of the Charging Ram, and so on - which characters with a focus on charging will pick up anyway. (The appearance of these things hasn't exactly helped the standing of Heedless Charge, either!) Likewise, charging is now a viable option for a much larger number of classes: many of them have gained access to "can be used as a melee basic attack" powers of some sort since the PHB1, and the newest classes often have a built in stat swap for their basic attacks. No, it doesn't cover every class, but charging isn't limited to Str/weapon/melee characters anymore. ----- OTOH, that points to a different problem: if I'm after a charge-based character then I'm probably better off getting a Badge of the Berserker and playing as some other race that grants a more useful set of abilities.



The thing though that some of us are kinda pointing out is that while there are items, feats, and powers that can accomplish the same or similar things, that's not the same as a race just getting it for free as a racial trait.  That changes things regardless of it other characters can accomplish the same thing.  Because for others it would involve taking up a magic item slot, or wasting a feat, or choosing that one particular power.  Entirely different ball game than just a race naturally being able to avoid OAs from charging.  Which is part of the reason why it can easily become OP.
Furthermore it takes up space that could be dedicated to a good racial feature. If anything the abundance of other options for avoiding OA from charging makes the dash ability more of a bad idea.
and here i thought you were going to do a kobold race.
Amazed at how obtuse people can be since 1972.