Dragon 395 - Confessions of a Full-Time Wizard: Rules of Engagement

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Dragon 395
Confessions of a Full-Time Wizard: Rules of Engagement

by Shelly Mazzanoble

Shelly offers D&D advice for the lovelorn, and makes a big announcement.

Talk about this Article here.


this is the first article in a very long time that i've really related to the Mazzanoble writing style. Although, I have to admit that I falsely believed that Confessions of a Part-Time Sorceress would get my wife interested in playing.

So, good article; I vote for the red dragon loosing a blaze of flame toward a tiny ceramic couple with shackled ankles.

The beholder will look too weird for the occassion; the giant d20 will seem too niche for non-gamers to connect with. The dragon will be recognizeable and appreciated by even the most casual of Twilight readers. It will be a hit while the other two would be terrible misses.

[The dragon attacking the shackled couple on the cake] will be a hit while the other two would be terrible misses.

I see what you did there.

Saludos Adriano
Being married to a fellow D&D'er is fantastic.  (Having kids who play D&D with you and your spouse is even better... but maybe you should just worry about the nuptials for now...)

Anyway, great article.  And if I may make some humble wedding cake suggestions...

Well, first things first, congratulations!

∴ "Virtus junxit, mors non separabit." 

Def congrats to our Player-in-Chief. How much pomp and circumstance does she get, exactly? Hah. Have a "flyover" of paper dragons.

Also, wrecan, your centerpiece pic isn't working. 

Gold is for the mistress, silver for the maid

Copper for the craftsman, cunning at his trade.

"Good!" said the Baron, sitting in his hall,

"But Iron -- Cold Iron -- is master of them all." -Kipling


Miss d20 Modern? Take a look at Dias Ex Machina Game's UltraModern 4e!


57019168 wrote:
I am a hero, not a chump.
That's odd.  It works for me.
Also having problems viewing Wrecan's centerpiece. It doesn't "spoil" when I click show.
Congratulations! Don't forget to register for the waffle iron. ;)
I tried retyping the address for the Centerpiece pic.  Does it work now?
Wow-- I had no idea the D&D community would be such experts in cake art! I like them all. Agree that the beholder would be weird but that's what I kind of like about it. I'm thinking "normal" cupcakes but we do a special "groom's cake" that's D&D themed. Or.. what about a normal cake and beholder cupcakes?

Thanks for your congratulations. Remember how all my columns were about Gamma World for like 3 months? I'm really, really hoping that doesn't happen here but wedding planning is very similar to running through a string of encounters. Every time my mom yells things like "There's not enough cheese on the menu!" or "NO WAY, there will not be an official tapping of the keg instead of a toast" I start thinking of similarities between her and various monsters.  (Except I would never fireball my mommy. Then again it's only January...)
We had a couple from our group get married recently. 

They had a DnD cake, with hand painted minis to represent the wedding couple.
Not sure if the images are going to show correctly or not, you can right click on them to see them. 


Congratulations Shelly! That's great news

As for the cake, I agree that the Red Dragon would be the more interesting, recognizable, and potentially best looking cake topper. For our cake topper, a friend of ours who is an artist made us a pair of cat figurines in wedding attire holding paws due to her knowing us and us having met through the musical CATS. So something unique and unusual and relating to the two of you is perfect Perhaps you can get some of the people who used to design minis to design the cake topper?

As for some of the other things mentioned in your article, I actually haven't actively tried to get my wife to play D&D. It's one of the few geeky things that we don't do together, but it's in part that she doesn't have a lot of interest in learning the game and I don't think my regular gaming group would relate well with her at the table (some social occasions where we begin taking about the game leave her severely glassy-eyed so there is evidence to the non-relating). There is also the fact that the last time I brought a girlfriend to the table (different group entirely), it brought about some real bad issues that caused a permanent split not only from her, but certain members of the group. Not that such would happen with her or the current group, but as you said, it provides some time for each of us to do their own thing.

As for the group heading to the beach house to game? My current group has for five years now scheduled an annual Gaming retreat where we rent a nice cabin somewhere and spend three to four days gaming and having fun as friends. So it's a great idea Last time when I did this, the wife had plans for several friends to come up and stay with her and do some shopping, pedicures, and a hockey game. So she certainly had her own plans. Married couples do not need to always move in lockstep, joined at the hip. But they do need to schedule plenty of time for each other and actually talk (yeah, you rolled well on your diplomacy, but can you actually articulate what you are trying to be diplomatic about?).

Best wishes to you and the soon to be husband

Tim Eagon My DDI Articles.

DDEX2-8 Foulness Beneath Mulmaster

Follow me on Twitter @Tim_Eagon

Congraulations Shelly.  A 3D cake of a huge Red Dragon would be awesome.
Before the exchange of rings and vows, dont forget to draw a D&D Fortune CardTM  Smile
" I'm thinking "normal" cupcakes but we do a special "groom's cake" that's D&D themed."

That made me think of one of my friend's birthday cake a couple years back. She had a large cake with the side decorated to make a mouth. Then there were a bunch of cupcakes with plastics arms that were either fleeing or attacking the "monster" cake, some of them were holding forks and candle "torches". I think that would be very fitting to have some PC cupcakes fighting the dragon or beholder.

And I'm definitely in favor of the tapping of a keg as a replacement for the toast, for whatever some random person on the internet's agreement can add to your diplomacy check with your mom.
Congratulations, Shelley!

Go right on ahead and write those columns about your wedding plans, if that's what's driving you.  Mature readers will get it.  Immature readers will learn soon enough.

My D&D-loving children and I watch Cake Boss, and I hope you have someone equivalent in your area who can do justice to your ideas.  Cupcakes feel like the minions of cake foods, and you (or your caterer) can make them into truly aberrant shapes with some effort.  Keep the beholder as the main attraction, if you go aberrant.  Your guests can deal with weird dessert (and weird anything else) - true friends and family will see the smile your face and your groom's face, and they will be happy for you.

I look forward to reading your future columns, whatever you decide to focus on.  Great writing is great writing.  A pleasure to read it for free.  Thanks for your hard work.

Ah, for wrecan's Centerpiece, I just had to right click-->open in another tab.


Patories, yours are fun as well. 

Gold is for the mistress, silver for the maid

Copper for the craftsman, cunning at his trade.

"Good!" said the Baron, sitting in his hall,

"But Iron -- Cold Iron -- is master of them all." -Kipling


Miss d20 Modern? Take a look at Dias Ex Machina Game's UltraModern 4e!


57019168 wrote:
I am a hero, not a chump.
Cupcakes feel like the minions of cake foods

Nice.  I am swiping that joke. 

And I agree.  Keep us apprised of the wedding planning hoopla.
I knew the article about the Gamma World party of cats going into the Tomb of Horrors was missing a juicy ending!  Congrats to the both of you.  Three cheers!!!
It is great having a spouse who has similar interests... ie gamer...the irony is the kids end up better role players than either of the parents. I mean my 5 year old gestures and speaks in character and describes how her robinhoodish rogue uses her whip tricks while capturing the bad guys.. I mean ahem awsome. (zero hit points = whatever your players are comfortable with)

  Creative Character Build Collection and The Magic of King's and Heros  also Can Martial Characters Fly? 

Improvisation in 4e: Fave 4E Improvisations - also Wrecans Guides to improvisation beyond page 42
The Non-combatant Adventurer (aka Princess build Warlord or LazyLord)
Reality is unrealistic - and even monkeys protest unfairness
Reflavoring the Fighter : The Wizard : The Swordmage - Creative Character Collection: Bloodwright (Darksun Character) 

At full hit points and still wounded to incapacitation? you are playing 1e.
By virtue of being a player your characters are the protagonists in a heroic fantasy game even at level one
"Wizards and Warriors need abilities with explicit effects for opposite reasons. With the wizard its because you need to create artificial limits on them, they have no natural ones and for the Warrior you need to grant permission to do awesome."


Many congratulations!

I'd go with the dragon cake. I like the symbolism--life might often seem like a huge, red dragon belching fire at you, but at least you're facing it together, as any good adventuring party should.
Congratulations! I wish you a lifetime of happiness together.

On a silly note, I hope this doesn't interfere with you writing your regular columns. I've really enjoyed them lately, especially the one about the cats.

I agree with the poster who said go for the dragon. Everyone likes a dragon, probably even your mom. Is your mom okay with D&D? If not, tell her you're going with the beholder, and then when she freaks out you can tell her you're compromising with her and suggest the dragon.
Congratulations, Shelly! 

And again, you write a very enjoyable column, and one of interest to the DM part of me as well: I've tried many times to get girlfriends and female friends and other friends who are just not usually interested in that sort of thing to try D&D, with varying success. 

But truly, a heart-felt congratulations.  May your life together be happy, long, fun, and beautiful.

Before posting, why not ask yourself, What Would Wrecan Say?


A great man once said "If WotC put out boxes full of free money there'd still be people complaining about how it's folded." – Boraxe

What this silliness of having to download an article?
Plans are always subject to change.
God bless you and your soon to be union, Shelly.

If there's one thing I can depend on, it's your articles. Come hell or high water, you're still releasing them, right on clockwork. :D
Oh Content, where art thou?
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